To Find You
by shinygoldstars
Summary: Finn Hudson and Rachel Berry were both determined that they would never fall out of love with each other, and that if they ever lose each other, they would find a way back.
1. Regrets

**So this is my first story, and I'm not an experienced writer, I just wanted to try this out.**

**I do not own Glee.**

* * *

_Rachel believes Finn Hudson is the only guy for her; she promised him that she will never fall in love with anyone else. Sometimes she's scared that one day he would leave her even though he assured her several times that he wouldn't. She believes him, and she trusts him with all her heart she just wishes she would stop feeling so insecure sometimes, Finn tells her that there's nothing wrong with feeling a bit insecure, even though there's nothing to worry about. He promised her one time that one day, she will become his wife, and that they would experience life together. Finn never doubted their love, he believes that they would always be together, and he is very certain that the love they have will never fade. _

_Rachel and Finn were both snuggled up in the couch in Rachel's living room. Finn agreed to watch The Notebook with her because she said she was feeling lonely. The part where Allie was banned from seeing Noah got Rachel thinking. _

_"__Finn?"_

_"__Yeah, Rach?"_

_"__Do you believe in us?"_

_"__Of course I do." _

_"__No, I mean, do you think if we ever lose our ways, we'd be able to find ourselves again? Back to each other?"_

_"__We will always find our way back to each other, Rachel. Nothing is ever going to break our tether; we will always be together. No matter what." _

_"__You promise?"_

_"__I promise." _

* * *

"Rachel Berry, will you marry me?"

Rachel stared down at the ring her boyfriend (about to be fiancée?) was holding in between his index finger and thumb.

Feeling slightly dizzy, she tried to get herself to say the words that have been on her mind the moment he pulled out the ring. "Yes," she breathed out, "Yes" she managed to say a little louder. Her heart was racing; her mind was filling up with endless thoughts of what her future is going to be like from now on.

_I must be dreaming._ Rachel thinks to herself.

It was until she felt a cool metal ring slip up her finger that made her realize that this wasn't a dream. "Oh god, it's so beautiful!" Rachel exclaimed admiring the diamond ring on her finger.

The proposal wasn't anything over-the-top. The location wasn't where they first met, or a special place they would go to when they wanted to hide away from the world. He didn't take her out to dinner with overpriced food. He didn't even kneel down to ask the question. They were both just cuddled up under a tree in his mother's garden when he pulled out the ring from his pocket, asked if she wanted to marry him, and then nervously waited for an answer. It was a simple proposal but she loved it.

"I'm excited." Rachel smiled. "Of the future. _Our_ future." She intertwined her fingers with her _fiancée_. She hopes that she will actually become a wife this time. The last thing she wants is another marriage that wouldn't go through. It's been years since her last attempted wedding but the terrible feeling she got when she was placed on a train instead still lingers.

"I love you so much Rachel."

"I love you too, Jesse."

* * *

Rachel never thought Jesse would be the one she would start having a family with. She never thought of Jesse being the one she would spend the rest of her life with. She always thought it would be with Finn Hudson.

They drifted apart years ago. Ever since Finn put her to that train, things were the same again. Not that Rachel's complaining because if it wasn't for what he did, she probably wouldn't be living her dream right now. But Rachel still hoped things would work out between them. They were both fine despite everything that went down between them, but when Santana accidentally mentioned to Finn about Rachel's pregnancy scare, he got mad. Finn wasn't really sure how to feel about it but he felt guilty and angry when he found out. Guilty because he knew Rachel would have to drop out of NYADA and put her dreams on hold for the baby (if she planned on keeping it); and mad because Rachel should've told him about it, she shouldn't have kept it from him.

They fought over the phone and Rachel kept telling him that it's not a big deal, and what's done is done. Finn of course, wouldn't listen, he believes he had the right to know about the situation so he yelled at her telling her how wrong she is. But when Rachel told him that there was a possibility that it wouldn't even be _his _child but _Brody's_, something in him snapped so he ended the call.

Rachel kept calling him and trying to apologize, she wanted to visit Lima herself so she can beg for Finn's forgiveness but she was too busy balancing NYADA and Funny Girl rehearsals (yes she got the part!). Rachel was worried that she will never hear from Finn ever again and at the same time, she was furious because he was overreacting.

Finn called two months later apologizing on his behalf for ignoring her, he told her that he was busy with college, but still it was no excuse he still should've at least called and resolved the fight instead of leaving her hanging so he apologized for that. But even though all was forgiven, they were still drifting apart and Rachel feels like there was nothing she can do about the empty distant feeling she felt with Finn.

Finn became distant with Rachel ever since he started dating a girl named Katie. She had long brunette hair and was tall and slim (just like a super model). Katie was just a rebound for Finn because he really wanted to stop feeling lonely all the time. He started getting comfortable with the distance and the feeling of loneliness started fading away.

Rachel tried not to be upset when she heard about Finn and Katie. She wasn't mad, she didn't even try to persuade Finn to break up with Katie since she had no right to tell him not date anyone, so Rachel just focused on herself.

When Kurt told Rachel that Finn and Katie were already having relationship issues, she saw this as an opportunity for her and Finn to work things out and be together again. She was excited for opening night because she was sure that what she prepared to tell Finn will convince him to be with her again.

However, she was wrong._ He didn't even come._ During the after-party for her opening night, she asked Kurt why Finn wasn't here, Kurt was hesitant when he answered her, _"He told me he was on a date" _

Rachel's mood dropped at his answer. She remained silent for the rest of the night.

She forgave Finn after a week of phone calls, emails and text messages saying how sorry he was. And once the anger was out of her system she tries to convince Finn that they could be together again, that they could make it no matter how far away they are from each other. Unfortunately, Finn would always turn her down and kept reminding her that he's with someone else.

When Finn told her that he has already moved on, she wouldn't believe him. But she was tired, tired of chasing someone who doesn't even want her anymore so she left him alone. Santana and Kurt were there to comfort her and assure her that things would turn out fine. But she didn't believe them. Kurt swore he would murder his brother hurting Rachel, he couldn't believe his brother would want to be with Katie instead of Rachel. Santana couldn't stand Rachel being so sad so she convinced her to go out to a bar, and even though Kurt thinks alcohol isn't the answer, he agrees with Santana so they both took Rachel out to a bar and that was the night Jesse re-entered Rachel's life.

Rachel was a bit hesitant to be with Jesse again, but she got more comfortable every time they would hang out. The closer she got with Jesse, the more she forgot about Finn and the heartache he caused. She wanted to believe that Jesse was just a rebound and that they weren't serious, she still wanted to believe she would get back together with Finn, one day.

When Finn moved to New York, she thought she had a chance. So she would spend less time with Jesse and more time with Finn. When Finn told her he was still with Katie, It messed with her mind, she started to think that he loves Katie now because he said that Katie stayed in Lima. Rachel was mad because they were _both_ in New York, and they didn't have to leave the state just to see each other yet Finn chose to be in a long distance relationship with someone else. So Rachel confronted Finn and asked him if he still wants her, and the moment he told her he doesn't love her anymore, she completely gave up on him; on _them. _

They didn't talk for weeks but they learned to be civilized with each other (for Kurt's sake), and they ended up being friends again. Rachel wasn't too happy that they aren't as close as they used to be but she's grateful that Finn is still in her life.

* * *

"You're engaged?!"

Rachel rolled her eyes at her best friend. "Why are you surprised? We've been together for four years."

"But I always thought you'd come into your senses and leave _him_!" Kurt shouted.

"What are you talking about Kurt? He treats me right!" Rachel defended, already frustrated with how this conversation is going.

"Sure he does." Kurt replied sarcastically.

"Okay, why not you tell me what he did wrong _besides_ cracking an egg on my head!" Rachel snapped. She couldn't believe he would think Jesse was still that kind of guy when he knows he's wrong because he's always been with Rachel to witness how _perfect_ he treats her.

"I still get a bad vibe from him but you're right," Kurt sighed in defeat, "He treats you right" he mumbled with a hint of annoyance.

Kurt respects their relationship. He wouldn't purposely make Jesse feel uncomfortable whenever he was around. In fact, they would have small talks about Rachel and how good she's been doing in her life. Jesse did change for the better but sometimes he acts like his old self without even realizing it. Kurt isn't even sure he should be bothered by it but he lets it go for his best friend's sake.

Rachel frowned. She was definitely not happy at Kurt's reaction. "I thought you would be happy for me." She said, biting her lip as she looked down and played with her fingers.

"Okay, Okay," Kurt stood up from the couch motioning Rachel to stand up too, "I'm sorry. I am happy that you're happy," He took both her hands pulling her in for a hug, "I promise."

Rachel smiled widely and hugged him back. "Thank you Kurt. And don't worry, Jesse and I both agreed that you'd be the wedding planner." She said excitingly as she pulled away.

Kurt just rolled his eyes playfully. He is genuinely happy for his best friend.

* * *

_Knock Knock Knock. _

Finn rolled off his couch, groaning. He clumsily walked to the door knocking over a magazine rack on the way. He opened the door and saw his Latina friend smiling widely at him. "What do you want?" he asked grumpily.

"Well good morning to you too" Santana rolled her eyes as she let herself in.

"Santana, what are you doing here." Finn slammed the door, completely irritated at Santana's presence.

"Don't you have to go to work?"

"No, but I have some paper work to grade so get out." Finn replied sternly.

"Why are you being a fucking asshole this morning? Did someone reject your sex offer last night?"

Finn sighed in frustration, "Look, I'm sorry but I really need to grade these papers so will you please leave." He tried telling her as nice as possible.

"Whatever, I didn't plan on staying. I just wanted to tell you that Rachel is throwing a party on Sunday and she wants you to come." Santana took one last look at Finn, "You really need to fix yourself up." Santana said before leaving Finn alone in his apartment.

Finn rolled his eyes as he made his way towards his desk to start grading his students' papers. He hasn't seen Rachel in 3 weeks. The last time he saw her, they were having dinner with Kurt and Santana because Puck and Quinn came to visit to introduce their new baby to everyone.

Finn misses being close with Rachel, he wouldn't deny that. He wishes things didn't turn out the way it did. He wonders if there will come a time where he and Rachel will be as close as they were before. He really, really hopes so.

* * *

Rachel looked at herself at the mirror; she smoothed out her red dress and fixed her hair a bit. She took a deep breath as she makes her way to her side table beside her bed, and picked up a small jewelry box.

She took her engagement ring out of the jewelry box and slipped it in her ring finger.

"You ready princess?" Kurt asked as he entered the room.

"Yeah, I don't know why I'm so nervous. How do I look?" She asked.

"Beautiful, Rachel. And you're glowing! Please don't tell me you're pregnant already!" Kurt joked.

Rachel laughed as she smacked Kurt's arm slightly, "Is Finn coming?"

"Not sure. I haven't talked to him in a week." Kurt replied.

"Oh" Rachel bit her lip, trying to hide a frown.

Kurt noticed Rachel's change of mood and said, "Come on, they're waiting for you. Especially Quinn."

"Okay," Rachel took a deep breath, "I'll be out in a minute. I promise."

"Alright" Kurt smiled at her before exiting her bedroom.

Rachel looks at the mirror one last time, "Soon, You will become Rachel St. James" she tells herself with a smile on her face.

* * *

"Finn! I'm so happy you're here!" Rachel squealed.

Finn was caught off guard when she threw herself at him. "H-hey!" he stuttered, hugging her back.

"I'm sorry for sending Santana to inform you about this, I wanted to personally invite you but.." Rachel smiled getting a bit lost in her own thoughts before continuing to what she was going to say, "..I've been busy"

Finn took a moment to study Rachel; she looked extremely happy, and beautiful. She's glowing. It made Finn smile. It's been a while since he saw her _this_ happy. "Don't worry about it" Finn assured her.

Rachel led Finn inside her apartment. Finn looked around and saw a small group of Rachel's friends, he assumes are her cast mates, gathered up in a circle gossiping about Broadway.

"Hey man!" Finn called out to Puck when he saw him sitting in the couch drinking a beer.

"It's been long" Puck smiled and stood up to give Finn a man hug.

"Yeah. So how's everything? How's Jack?" Finn asked as he sat down on the couch.

"Things are great. Jack's amazing, the cutest little dude in the world," Puck replied proudly, "He's actually with those two ladies over there." Puck said pointing at Rachel and Santana who was playing with the 7 month old baby across the room.

Finn smiled at the sight. Rachel is so good when it comes to kids. He loves it when he sees her playing with little babies or toddlers. He wonders how Rachel would act around her own kids; the thought of it makes his stomach flutter. He knows she'd be an amazing mom.

"Hey babe!" Finn heard Jesse call out as he saw the curly haired man enter the apartment. Snapping out of his thoughts, he turned his head to see Jesse making his way towards Rachel.

"You're here!" Rachel exclaimed with so much excitement as she wrapped her arms around Jesse's neck.

Finn saw Jesse wrap his arms around Rachel's waist as he gave her kisses all over her face. The sight of that made Finn want to throw up.

_Disgusting _Finn thought.

Rachel gave Jesse a quick peck on the lips before pulling away. "Alright," she said loudly catching everyone's attention in the living room. "Now that Jesse's here, there's something we'd like to announce. First of.."

Finn zoned out as he felt his heart drop. _Announcement? _Finn gulped, suddenly nervous at what their announcement is goanna be. _Maybe they're going to Disneyland? _He stupidly thought to himself. Finn was too distracted with his own thoughts to notice Quinn trying to sit between him and Puck.

"You okay?" Quinn asked.

"I'm fine" Finn replied with a weak smile.

"..So now, we're taking the next step on our relationship.." _Oh no _Finn thought. He definitely doesn't want to hear this.

"We're engaged!" Rachel announced happily. Jesse kissed her forehead as she showed off the ring to her friends who were gathering around her with excitement to look at the ring.

Finn remained silent as he tried to absorb the news. He couldn't believe this was happening. He couldn't believe she was engaged to _Jesse, _out of all stood up from the couch and made his way towards Rachel, who was being squeezed by a very excited Quinn Fabray-Puckerman.

"Congratulations" Finn managed to say. He hugged Rachel when Quinn pulled away. "I'm so happy for you." He said as he pulled away.

"Thank you Finn" Rachel smiled and rested her head on Jesse's shoulder.

Finn looked at Jesse and reached out his hand to shake his, "Congratulations man, you better take care of her." Finn said trying to sound playful.

Jesse smiled at Finn, "Nothing to worry about." He said as he retrieved his hand.

Finn looked over at Rachel again, "So uh, do your dads know?" He asked just noticing that her dads aren't around.

Rachel nodded her head, "Yeah Jesse and I announced it to our parents during a big St. Berry dinner. They were happy for us." She replied with so much joy.

Finn gave her a small smile. He felt suffocated. He wanted to get out of here. "That's great," he looked around seeing people gathered around Kurt asking about the wedding details. "I, uh, better go." Finn said.

"What? Why?" Rachel asked with a slight frown.

"I got papers to grade," He lied. "I'll see you soon though, I promise." He lied again. Every time he tells her that he will see her soon, he never does. He doesn't make an effort to hang out with Rachel alone. He feels like he isn't ready for that. They only see each other when there was a get together.

"Oh. Alright. I'll see you around, Finn." She said with a hint of sadness in her voice.

Finn felt a bit guilty when he noticed the sadness in her voice. She knows he wouldn't keep that promise. "Alright, bye" he said a bit too quickly. He gave the newly engaged couple one last smile before he rushed out of the apartment.

* * *

Finn ran out of the building.

_Engaged.. to Jesse?! _Finn was angry at the thought of it.

He couldn't believe Rachel _still _couldn't see that she deserves _better_. Finn always thought Rachel would see the light and leave Jesse. Just like how he left Katie who, by the way, cheated on him with their former professor.

He slammed the door shut as he entered his apartment. He removed his leather jacket and dumped it on his couch as he made his way to his bed. He lied down, not bothering to remove his shoes, and stared up at the ceiling.

He doesn't trust Jesse. He knows he doesn't have the right to tell her who to be with, no one does. But he cares about her. He just doesn't want her to get hurt.

Finn grabbed a picture of both him and Rachel smiling wide from his nightstand.

"I miss you" he quietly said as if Rachel was there to hear it. He really does miss Rachel. He misses his best friend. And if he could turn back time and take back what he said that caused them to drift apart more than they already have, he would in a heartbeat.

* * *

_"__Rachel, no." Finn said as he turned his head to refrain Rachel from kissing him. _

_"__Don't you love me?" Rachel asked as she took a few steps back away from Finn. _

_They were both standing in the quiet living room, face to face in Finn's apartment; they were both exhausted after hanging out the whole afternoon together in Central Park._

_"__Rachel.." _

_"__Do you still love me or not?" She asked with frustration. Tears were streaming down her face._

_Finn didn't know what to answer. He wants her, he always have, and always will. But there's just so much going on right now he doesn't know exactly what to focus on. He was too busy worrying about looking for a good place to start his teaching career while he was working in a mechanic shop to pay for his rent, which is making him stressed out. And his mind is all over the place he can't really think properly. Besides, he's already with __**Katie**__. _

_"__It's about her, isn't it" She says quietly. _

_"__No. I-I don't even like her that much." _

_"__But you like her enough to skip my opening night just to have sex with her! You like her enough to still be with her instead of me even if she's miles away!" She screams. _

_That made something inside Finn snap, without thinking clearly, he responded, "Well can you blame her? She's better that you! And you're __**still **__with Jesse!" _

_Rachel stood still. Tears were streaming down her face. "Fuck you, Finn Hudson." She said._

_Finn tried to calm himself down before he says something he would regret forever, but he just couldn't. He was mad cause Rachel is mad that he's still with Katie even though she's still with Jesse? Yeah, fuck that. _

_"__Get this in your head, Rachel. I don't love you anymore." Finn said coldly. _

_And with that, Rachel left Finn alone in his apartment._

* * *

Finn shut his eyes tightly as if it would erase the unwanted memory.

_Maybe if Rachel wasn't moping around at that time, she would've had the right sense of mind and not fall for that __**douche bag **__again. _

Finn placed the picture down and tried to clear his mind.

Okay, so he couldn't really prove that Jesse doesn't treat Rachel right because as much as he hates to admit it, he actually does. Well he assumes he does because when he sees them together, he doesn't act like a self centered jerk and he actually watches out for her. And Rachel really looks happy when she's with him.

Finn stood up from his bed, frustrated that he couldn't sleep. He walked over to his closet and picked up a shoebox. It was filled with old pictures of him and Rachel back in high school. He carefully took the pictures out of the box until he saw ring that was resting on the remaining pictures that were still in the box. He picked up the ring and stared at it as another memory crept into his mind.

* * *

_"__It's yours, just keep it." Finn said angrily as he shoved the ring into Rachel's hands._

_"__I don't want it!" Rachel shouted as she threw the ring at Finn. _

_"__Well I don't want it either!" He growled. _

_"__Well it's either you keep it or I throw it away. I don't want to be reminded of what I lost" Rachel said coldly._

_When Finn didn't give her a response, Rachel spoke up, "Make up your mind and get the hell out of my apartment." And with that, Rachel stormed off into her room slamming the door shut. _

_Finn sighed and picked up the engagement ring before he let himself out of Rachel's apartment. _

* * *

Finn started to feel tired so he put the ring back into the box and returned all the pictures he took out before he made his way towards the bed. But something was still bugging him, so he got his cellphone and wrote out a text.

**_I'm really sorry I left early can we see each other again? I wanna make it up to you._**

Without thinking twice, he sent the message to Rachel.

He got an uneasy feeling on his stomach when he realized it has almost been an hour and she still didn't reply. Instantly regretting he even considered trying to make up for taking off so early (which Finn thinks isn't even a big deal), he placed his phone down and forced himself to sleep wishing he didn't even go to the party in the first place.


	2. Reconnecting

**I appreciate the reviews, favorites, and follows I got for this story, so thank you.**

**I don't own Glee.**

* * *

**_"_****_Distance, timing, breakdown, fighting_**

**_Silence, the train runs off its tracks_**

**_Kiss me, try to fix it, could you just try to listen?_**

**_Hang up, give up, for the life of us we can't get back" _**

**_–_****_Sad Beautiful Tragic by Taylor Swift._**

* * *

Rachel woke up the next morning still feeling exhausted from last night. She frowned when she noticed Jesse wasn't beside her. She got up from the bed, keeping the blanket wrapped around her naked body as she looked for her phone.

Rachel smiled when she saw the text she got from Finn. She felt a bit bad when she noticed the text was from last night. And typed an apology as quick as she can.

**_I am so sorry for not replying last night. I was too busy to notice I got a message. However, you can make it up to me later tonight, I have no plans :) _**

Rachel sat on the bed and tinkered with her phone as she waited for a reply.

"Morning beautiful." Jesse cooed as he entered the bedroom carrying a tray.

Rachel snapped her head up, startled. "Oh Jesse! I thought you left, I was about to call you."

"Nope, I wanted to make my fiancée some pancakes." He smiled as he set the tray down on the bed.

"I really appreciate the effort but that's not what I'm craving for right now" Rachel smirked.

"Oh really? Hmm. And what exactly are you craving for?" Jesse moved the tray down on the floor and climbed up the bed removing the blanket from Rachel's grasp exposing her naked body.

"You"

* * *

Finn groaned when he heard his phone buzz; he groggily opened his eyes and wiped the drool from the side of his mouth before reaching for his phone. He sighed in relief when he saw Rachel's reply, grateful she isn't ignoring him for basically blowing off the party.

**_its cool :) can I pick you up at 8?_**

Finn put his phone down before he made his way towards the kitchen to look for something to eat.

He couldn't stop thinking about tonight. The last time he asked Rachel to hang out with him, which was a _very _long time ago, Jesse tagged himself along and he ended up being the third wheel. Rachel apologized the next day explaining that Jesse was a bit paranoid that she was hanging out with an ex boyfriend. Finn assured her that it was fine, and that they could always hang out again; but they never did.

He really hopes Jesse won't tag himself along this time.

* * *

Rachel felt Jesse unwrap his arms from behind; she turned around and saw him roll off the bed.

"Where are you going?" She pouted.

"My sister wants to see me." He said as he picked up his clothes from the floor.

Karen St. James. She's younger than Jesse by two years. When Rachel met Karen for the first time, she instantly loved her. Rachel would always spend time with whenever Kurt and Santana weren't around when she wanted to be with a friend; only when she visits New York, of course, because she lives in California.

"When did she come here?" Rachel asked with excitement.

"Just now. I'm gonna pick her up in the airport. She wants some brother-sister bonding. Will you be okay?" Jesse asked as he placed on his clothes.

Rachel picked up her phone from the side table and looked at Finn's message.

**_That's fine. My rehearsals end at 5, anyway. See you soon!_**

"Yeah, I got rehearsals anyway." She told Jesse as she sent her reply to Finn.

"Alright," Jesse kissed Rachel's forehead, "I love you"

"Love you too" Rachel smiled as she watched her him leave the room.

Rachel sighed as she got up from bed to start getting ready for the day.

* * *

The day rolled by slowly for Rachel. It was a stressful day of rehearsals for her, she had to keep redoing a very intimate scene with her leading man as they were both trying to perfect the emotion and chemistry they were both required to show. Unfortunately, Andrew (the one who plays her love interest), wasn't feeling really well and when he was asked if he wanted to cut the rehearsals short, he insisted that he can keep going. When Rachel suggested him to take the rest of the day off because she didn't want to catch whatever sickness he had, he told her that food poisoning isn't contagious. Rachel had to keep herself from rolling her eyes at him.

Rachel rushed back to her apartment as soon as rehearsals were over. She took time in picking out her outfit, debating whether to wear a dress or jeans topped with a plain long sleeved shirt. She chose to wear a white, flowy, knee-length dress and a pink cardigan to keep herself from getting cold. She placed it on her bed so she can take a quick shower.

As soon as Rachel was done showering, and putting on a light amount of makeup, she checked the time on her phone.

**_6:45 PM_**

Rachel suddenly felt nervous realizing that Finn will be here anytime soon. She misses hanging out with him, she misses being close to him, she misses that feeling she had whenever she would be with him long before they even started dating back in high school. She misses her old friendship with Finn, and she hopes that she would get that friendship back one day.

Still feeling uneasy, Rachel downed herself with a glass of water hoping it would make her feel better. It didn't. Rachel groaned as she tried to think of something to do to distract her while she waits for Finn.

She was about to watch TV but she heard a knock on the door before she even made her way to the living room. Rachel stood still in the kitchen floor as if she didn't know what to do.

Rachel suddenly snapped out of her daze as she heard more knocking. She quickly smoothed out her dress as she made her way towards the door.

"Finn! Hey!" She greeted cheerfully as she opened the door.

Finn stared at her in awe, "Wow Rachel you look," Finn paused for a moment trying to think of what to say without feeling too awkward, "..good," he smiled, "you look really good" he complimented.

"Thank you," she looked down, blushing, "you look great too."

"Thanks. So uh, lets get going?"

"Okay, I'm just gonna get my purse, one sec." Rachel said quickly before turning back into her apartment.

* * *

"So what role did you score this time?" Finn asked trying to start a conversation after they both told their orders to the waiter.

He took Rachel to see a movie; they both watched a tragically beautiful romantic movie, which made Rachel cry because the husband died in the end due to a car accident. Finn awkwardly patted Rachel's back trying to calm her down when they were out of the movie house.

_"__It was so sad!" _Rachel said a bit to dramatically.

_"__It was still a nice movie. Come on, lemme take you to dinner before we finish off this night" _Finn suggested

_"__Okay" _Rachel said with a cute pout on her face which made Finn chuckle.

"Wendla Bergmann," Rachel smiled, "the show is called Spring Awakening. It's a rock musical and it contains lots of… very intense stuff."

Finn's curiosity spiked up, "Like?"

"Well, it contains rape, teen pregnancy, abortion, stuff like that" Rachel answered.

"Oh." Finn said, not sure of how to answer that.

Rachel giggled, "But I'm having lots of fun."

Finn smiled, "That's good to hear. I'm really glad you're living your dream. Some of my students admire you."

"Oh! I'm very glad to hear that! I should see them sometime." She said with so much excitement in her voice.

"Yeah I should introduce them to you. They're amazing kids." Finn loves his job; it makes him feel amazing knowing that he helps people out. He is close with his students, they aren't scared or ashamed to ask him for advices, he's always glad to help.

"I can tell that you're in a very good place right now with that look in your face. Is there a lucky lady in your life right now?" Rachel asked playfully with a smirk.

Finn cleared his throat, "Uh, no." he said a bit too bluntly.

"Oh." Rachel frowned. She wasn't sure if she should apologize or not.

Finn gave Rachel a reassuring smile, "But it doesn't matter, what matters is that I'm doing really well right now"

"Well, I'm very glad to hear that" Rachel said sincerely.

When their meals arrived, they both started catching up with each other on what they have both missed out on each other's life. Finn told Rachel more about his job and why he loves being a music teacher. He mentioned the time one of his students told him that she wrote an essay about Rachel and why she admired her, making Rachel feel proud of how far she has come. Rachel told Finn how her life change since her Broadway career started. She admits that sometimes the media can be very frustrating, but she tells him she's still very grateful and happy of how her life turned out to be. They both exchanged laughter and smiles all throughout dinner. For once, in a very long time, they both felt reunited.

Rachel never brought up Jesse during their conversations. Finn was glad she didn't.

* * *

"Thank you for spending time with me tonight. I had fun." Rachel said as she unlocked the door to her apartment with a key.

"It's no problem. I had a good time too." Finn said shoving both his hands into the pockets of his jeans.

"We gotta spend more time together with Kurt and Santana whenever they're free. I kinda miss all of us together." Rachel admitted.

"Yeah, we should." Finn agreed.

"So does that mean we will see each other soon?" Rachel asked hopefully.

"Yeah."

"You promise?"

"I promise."

Rachel smiled at his answer; she gave Finn one last goodbye before heading inside her apartment.

Rachel plopped down into her couch. She couldn't stop smiling, she felt so alive. Maybe she was happy that maybe her and Finn's friendship was slowly going back to the way it was before.

Rachel stared into space for a moment until she realized Jesse wasn't here. She furrowed her eyebrows as she wondered where he was. Picking up her phone, Rachel decided to call Jesse; when he didn't answer, she hung up and decided to text him instead.

**_Where are you? Are you gonna stay over tonight?_**

Rachel placed the phone down beside her and turned on the TV as she waited for him reply.

Jesse practically lives in Rachel apartment. He would stay over for at least four days every week; sometimes he would stay with her for a whole week. Rachel asked, one time, why couldn't he just move in with her but he said every couple needs their own space, sometimes. Rachel argued and said that they would live together eventually; she got upset when Jesse told her that they would only live together _if_ they ever get married because if they live together too soon, they might lose their spark and get bored with each other. She was sad knowing that Jesse didn't really believe in their relationship that much. So when Jesse was ignored for three days, he sent her a bunch of flowers in different varieties to apologize for what he said. Even though Rachel was still upset with him, she forgave him because she didn't want him to think she doesn't appreciate the effort he makes for her.

Rachel sighed when she still didn't recieve a reply from Jesse.

**_12:01 AM_**

Rachel's eyes widened when she checked the time on her phone. She closed the TV and made her way to the bathroom so she can clean up before getting into bed.

As soon as she was finished, she checked her phone one more time to see if Jesse replied. He didn't. She sighed as she sent a goodnight text to Jesse before putting her phone away and heading off to bed.

* * *

Two days later, Rachel went over to Kurt's apartment because she promised him that she'll come over to talk about the wedding. She couldn't help but ask if he heard from Jesse, Kurt rolled his eyes because she knows Jesse rarely talks to him. Kurt told her to calm down because he's probably busy, but Rachel said he would've told her that himself. When Kurt asked her why couldn't she just call Jesse, she said his phone was off, so Kurt just brought up the wedding to try to keep Rachel from worrying too much.

When Kurt and Rachel were talking about the wedding, Rachel was too distracted to focus. She had this weird feeling that was bothering her; she couldn't describe the feeling. She tried to focus on whatever Kurt was saying hoping the feeling that was bugging her would go away.

"Do you guys have a date in mind?" Kurt asked.

"Well, we want a spring wedding so maybe around April." Rachel answered.

"Hmm…" Kurt said as he browsed through the wedding magazine, "An outdoor or indoor wedding?"

Rachel rolled her eyes, "Indoor."

"So when will you start officially planning the weeding?" Kurt asked, not looking up from the magazine he was browsing.

"Next week." Rachel answered suddenly becoming bored of the topic.

Kurt dropped the magazine, "That's great! I'm so excited to shop for your wedding dress! And ooh! Also the bridesmaid dresses! They should wear pink don't you think?" Kurt clasped his hands with excitement.

"Yeah." Rachel replied with a hint of irritation.

"Alright, why does it seem like I'm the one who's more excited in planning _your_ wedding than you are?" He asked with a raised eyebrow.

Rachel stayed quiet. She didn't know what to answer because she doesn't exactly know why.

"I told you not to worry about Jesse, I bet he's fine." Kurt said.

Rachel rolled her eyes. It wasn't because of Jesse, in fact, she forgot that he still hasn't responded to any of her texts or calls until Kurt brought him up just now.

"You're right," Rachel gave him a convincing smile, "I shouldn't worry. Do you think Santana is free today? I feel like hanging out with just you guys."

Kurt narrowed his eyes, "Are you and Jesse fighting?"

"No! Can't I want to hang out with you guys without assumptions that me and my boyfriend are fighting?" Rachel said in frustration.

"Fiancée" Kurt corrected.

"What?" Rachel asked clearly dumbfounded.

"Jesse is your fiancée, unless of course you're back to the boyfriend/girlfriend stage."

"Oh, right," Rachel sighed, "I think I just have too much in my mind. Can we go out with Santana now." Rachel demanded.

"Alright diva, I'll just give Santana a call." Kurt said as he stood up from his couch and walked away.

Rachel groaned she wanted to hit Kurt so hard.

* * *

It's been two days since he hung out with Rachel and still can't get over the feeling he had when he was with her. He wonders if Rachel is feeling the same thing right now.

He snapped out his thoughts when he heard his phone ring.

"Hello?" Finn answered not bothering to check the caller ID.

_"__Finny!" _

Finn took the phone away from his ear when he heard the girl's voice scream his name.

"Uhh," Finn started as he rested the phone back on his ear, "Patricia?" Finn asked trying to recognize the girl's voice.

_"__Yes baby, come spend the night with me I'm verryyy lonely" _

Finn rolled his eyes. He can tell she was drunk. It was a mistake to give her his phone number after having a one night stand with her because Patricia would annoy Finn if she had no other guy to call.

"No." Finn said sternly before he hung up the call right away.

Finn starts to think about all the time he wasted having one night stands, or going to clubs to hit on random girls whenever he has free time instead hanging out with Kurt, Santana, and Rachel. He would turn them down most of the time whenever he was invited to bond with them.

With the phone still in his hands, he decided to text Rachel.

**_Hey what are you up to?_**

Finn smiled when he got a reply a minute after.

**_I'm gonna have a movie marathon with Tana and Kurt, why?_**

Finn thought for a moment wondering what really made him want to text Rachel. An idea crossed his mind so he began to type out a reply.

**_Would you mind if I joined you guys?_**

Finn grew anxious as he waited for Rachel's reply. _What if she says no? _Finn thinks. He doesn't know if he can handle being rejected by Rachel.

When his phone buzzed he took a deep breath before he read the reply.

**_Of course :) I'll tell them you're joining us._**

Suddenly relieved when he read her message, he changed what he was wearing before heading out of his apartment.

* * *

"Finn's coming?" Santana asked completely shocked as she watched Rachel preparing some snacks.

"Yeah, what's wrong with that?" Rachel asked confused as she dumped a bag of potato chips into a big bowl.

"Well maybe because he barely wants to hang out with us, and when he does, he always seems bored." Santana pointed out.

"Well maybe he just feels lonely." Rachel shrugged.

"Doubt it, he would bring home a girl whenever he feels lonely, he wouldn't hang out with us." Santana said taking a handful of popcorn and shoving it into her mouth.

"Wait, what?" Rachel frowned.

"He would rather have sex with a whore than to hang out with us, Berry." Santana replied when she swallowed the contents in her mouth.

"It's going to be St. James soon." Rachel said ignoring what Santana just told her.

"Whatever let's take these," Santana picked up the two bowls from the counter and handed one bowl to Rachel, "to the living room. Kurt will be back here soon. What time is Hudson coming?"

Rachel followed Santana to the living room and placed the bowl of popcorn on the coffee table, "I don't know, in 15 minutes, maybe."

Suddenly, there was a knock on the door causing both Rachel and Santana to turn their heads.

"Wow that was fast." Santana smirked.

Rachel rolled her eyes as she made her way towards the door. Expecting to see Finn, a wave of disappointment hit her when she saw Kurt standing on the other side of the door instead.

"I got soda!" Kurt smiled widely, raising the 2-liter soda bottle into her face.

"Great." Rachel let Kurt in before she closed the door.

"So let's get started with this movie marathon shall we?" Kurt said placing the bottle of soda on the coffee table beside the two bowls.

"Wait, we gotta wait for Finn." Rachel said.

"Finn's coming?" Kurt asked confused.

Rachel sighed as she prepared herself for the questions she was about to receive.

* * *

When Finn arrived, they all decided to start their movie marathon with _A Walk To Remember_, which was Rachel's favorite chic flick. Santana was bored out of her mind so she kept whining to change the move while Rachel kept hushing her, trying to focus on the movie. Finn kept glancing at Rachel; he tries to hide a smile every time she reacts to a very sweet scene, while Kurt kept looking at Finn with confusion, very skeptical to why all of a sudden he wanted to hang out with them.

"Oh god, get over it Rachel. It's just a movie." Santana said with annoyance.

"You have a cold heart, Santana!" Rachel snapped as she wiped her tears away.

"Do you really think I care?" Santana rolled her eyes.

Finn chuckled at their little argument causing Kurt to look at him.

"What?" Finn asked, knitting his eyebrows in confusion when he noticed Kurt looking at him.

"I don't remember the last time you _willingly_ wanted to spend time with us." Kurt said bringing up the previous argument he had with Rachel when she told him Finn was coming to join them.

"Seriously Kurt, let it go!" Rachel jumped into Finn's defense.

Before Kurt can respond, he heard the front door open.

"Babe? I'm back!" Jesse called out.

Finn suddenly felt like he wanted to just leave when he heard his voice, but he didn't really want to make Rachel upset so he forced himself to stay.

"Oh look Rachel, your soon-to-be husband is here." Santana teased.

"Well, hello Rachel and friends." Jesse greeted with a smile causing Rachel to tense up.

"What are you doing here, Jesse?" Rachel snapped.

"Woah, wait, what did I do?" Jesse asked in confusion, clearly taken aback.

"What did you do?" Rachel stood up, "What did you do?!" She repeated with a raised voice as she made her way towards Jesse and slapped him hard across the face, "YOU CAN'T JUST IGNORE MY CALLS AND COME BACK ACTING LIKE YOU DID NOTHING WRONG" Rachel yelled with so much fury before storming into her bedroom leaving shocked expressions on everyone's faces.

"Rachel wait!" Jesse called out as he followed her footsteps.

The moment of silence in the living room caused Kurt to clear his throat, "Well isn't this is awkward." He said breaking the silence.

"Did you guys know they were fighting?" Finn asked.

Santana just shook her head.

"Rachel told me they weren't. She was just worried sick because he wouldn't answer her calls or respond to her text messages." Kurt explained.

Finn shook his head in disbelief, "What an asshole" he mumbled.

* * *

"You're overreacting, Rachel. I'm fine." Jesse said trying to calm her down.

"You should've informed me! Where the hell have you been?! I don't think it takes more than a day to bond with your sister!" Rachel shouted.

Jesse remained silent and began to stare into space. Rachel was starting to get impatient as she waited for an answer.

"Jesse!" She yelled trying to get his attention, "Tell me where you have been!" she demanded.

"Why are you being so clingy?" Jesse started growing frustrated.

"I was _worried, _Jesse! I was waiting for your reply!" Rachel yelled.

"Well I'm here now, that's all that matters!" he yelled back.

Rachel started getting tired of yelling so she took a few deep breaths, "Is it so hard to tell me where you have _been_?" Rachel asked with gritted teeth, trying to keep her tone done

Jesse paused. "I told you, I was with Karen." He said as he ran his fingers through his hair.

"For two whole days?" Rachel asked a bit skeptical.

"You know, one of the most important thing in relationships is trust." Jesse said sternly.

Rachel sighed, "It's not that I don't trust you, Jesse. Why didn't she call me then? She would always visit me every time she visits here."

"Are you trying to accuse me of something?" Jesse asked, starting to get angry again.

"No! Of course not! I was just saying! She would've at least dropped by here!" Rachel said defending her words.

"You know what, I can't take this. I'm leaving." Jesse said with frustration as he started to walk away.

"No," Rachel grabbed his arm, "we're not done here. I'm not gonna allow you to run away from this fight!" Rachel said but Jesse ignored her and wriggled away from Rachel's grip.

"Jesse, please stay, let's solve this." Rachel pleaded with a hint of desperation in her voice. Rachel tried gripping onto Jesse's arm harder, but he was too strong for her to hold him back. Jesse made his way out of the apartment leaving a crying Rachel alone in the bedroom.

* * *

Finn's blood started to boil when he saw a very frustrated Jesse storming out of the apartment. Anger turned into concern for Finn as he wondered how Rachel is doing right now.

"Someone should go check on her," Santana stood up and grabbed her coat from the side of the coach, "Brittany just texted me so I have to go." Santana waved them goodbye before she left.

Silence. Kurt just stared down at the floor while Finn thinks if he should check on Rachel, or not.

"I think I'll go in there and check on her." Finn finally spoke up.

"Nuh uh, she's _my_ best friend. I'll do it." Kurt argued.

"She's my friend too, Kurt!" Finn argued back.

"But you were never there for her." Kurt pointed out.

Finn frowned, "That's not true. We just grew apart. Look, I just want to be that friend again where I would always be there for her no matter what."

"But why? Why now?" Kurt asked.

Finn paused and mentally asked himself the same thing. _Yeah, why now? _Finn thought to himself. Finn tried his best to come up with an answer, but he couldn't seem to find one, "Does it really matter?" he finally said.

Kurt sighed, "You know what, fine. I'm leaving."

* * *

As soon as Finn was left all alone, he made his way towards Rachel's bedroom.

"Rachel?" Finn called out as he knocked on her bedroom door.

_"__Go away." _He heard her say through her sobs.

"Come on, Rachel. Please let me in," Finn pleaded slightly.

When the door slightly opened, he let himself in. His heart broke at the sight that was in front of him; it made him want to beat Jesse up.

"Rachel…"

"I'm scared, Finn. What if he'll get tired and leave me, one day?" Rachel cried.

Finn pulled her into his arms and rubbed her back, "I doubt he'd leave you just because of a little fight."

"I'm scared that we would start arguing a lot, and that he'll get tired of me and just… leave."

"He'd be a complete idiot if he did that."

Rachel sighed as she wraps her arms around his waist enjoying the comfort that was slowly taking over her sadness.

"I love him, you know? It's supposed to be me and him against the world." Rachel chuckled softly.

A memory instantly hit Finn when she said that.

* * *

_"__Finn!" Rachel laughed loudly, "Stooopppp" she whined._

_Finn ignored her request, "Nuh uh I'm gonna make you pee!" he said as he tickled the sides of her stomach. _

_"__Finn no! stop or no kisses for a week!" She threatened playfully. _

_Finn instantly stopped and pouted, "You don't mean that."_

_"__Oh yes, I do." _

_Finn threw his hands up and sighed dramatically, "Alright, fine." He lay down next to her._

_"__I love you, Finn Hudson." Rachel gave him a peck on the lips before she cuddled up against him._

_"__I love you too, Rachel." _

_"__It's me and you against everything" she mumbled. _

_"__Yeah, it is." Finn agreed with a huge smile on his face. _

* * *

Finn had to hold back the tears that were threatening to fall from the corner of his eyes. He didn't know why he was so affected by that comment. He didn't know what to reply to that so he just stayed quiet and continued rubbing her back trying to ignore the sudden hurt he felt.


	3. Realization

**_"_****_Here comes the rain again, falling from the stars, drenched in my pain again, becoming who we are."_**

**_-Wake Me Up When September Ends by Green Day_**

* * *

It's been four days since the fight and Rachel still hasn't spoken to Jesse. She didn't bother to call him, she thought they both need some space from each other. Everything was just blown out of proportion; Jesse shouldn't have ran away from the argument while she shouldn't have doubted Jesse even just a little bit. But was it wrong for her to know why he didn't respond to her calls or texts during the two days he was gone?

"You should call him" Santana suggested.

"I don't want to." Rachel replied not looking up from the script she was studying for the show.

"Why not?" Santana asked.

"I don't know." Rachel shrugged.

"This whole situation doesn't bother you one bit?"

Rachel just shrugged at her best friend's question.

Santana was annoyed with Rachel's attitude. She's been shutting everyone out. She wouldn't respond to any of their concerned questions about how she and Jesse are doing. Rachel would always change the topic whenever Jesse was brought up. Santana couldn't tell if Rachel was sad or angry; she wouldn't know because Rachel wouldn't tell her.

Rachel doesn't really care about her situation with Jesse. She was just annoyed. Annoyed because she expected Jesse to come back and apologize for acting like an asshole, but he didn't so she's giving him the space she assumes he wants.

Finn would text Rachel to try to keep her mind off things. He hated how she cried in his arms that night. He hated how she was crying for _him_. He hated the way Jesse treated her. Someone like that doesn't deserve her tears. But all drama aside, he was happy at how their friendship is progressing.

While Santana and Finn were concerned about Rachel and how she was handing her situation about Jesse, Kurt was too busy showing Rachel different pictures of wedding dresses, and wedding themes. He notices how Rachel still doesn't seem excited when he shows her all the wedding ideas; he lets it go and blames it on the stress he assumes she's in due to the fight.

When Jesse finally came over to Rachel's apartment on a Friday night, he apologized to her for how he handled things. He explained to her that Karen caught a fever and he had to take care of her.

"Why didn't you just tell me that?" Rachel asked.

"Because when someone feels sick, you act as if they're dying." Jesse chuckled.

"It's not wrong to be concerned for someone who feels sick!" Rachel feeling a bit offended.

"I know," Jesse rubbed her back in soothing circles, "but just don't get too concerned." He said causing Rachel to roll her eyes at him. "Anyway," he continued, "I'm really sorry." Jesse apologized one more time when he noticed they were slowly drifting away from their main topic.

"It's fine. I love you." Rachel said giving Jesse a peck on the lips.

"I love you too," Jesse said.

Things went smoothly between Rachel and Jesse after that. However, it didn't make that terrible feeling of distance Rachel felt between her and Jesse go away. When she drifted apart from Finn, someone she thought would be her forever; it broke her in every way possible. She still remembers the hurt she felt, how she cried herself to sleep every night not wanting to wake up the next morning with the feeling of a very broken heart for a whole month. Rachel does not want to feel that way again.

Whenever Rachel and Jesse find the time to be together, they plan for their wedding. They both already picked a date and a venue for their wedding. Kurt suggested to the both of them to start making a guest list, but Jesse said he's too busy with work to do that. When Kurt told Jesse that he'll take his place and help Rachel out with the guest list, Rachel wanted to protest because she wanted her and Jesse to do it together since it is _their_ wedding but she didn't want to stir up another possible fight so she stayed quiet.

"You know, it concerns me how uninterested you look whenever we talk about wedding stuff." Kurt said.

Rachel just shrugged.

"Are you okay?" he asked with concern.

"I'm just…" Rachel sighed deeply, "…tired I guess."

Kurt wasn't convinced. "You sure?"

There was a moment of silence.

"It's Jesse." Rachel finally said.

Kurt tried not to roll his eyes remembering how Rachel was too busy worrying about her and Jesse's relationship to focus on planning the wedding. Why must Rachel bring up her problems with Jesse every time they're trying to make plans for the day that will start her new beginning in life? How many problems could Rachel and Jesse possibly have? Was that supposed to be a sign that they aren't meant to get married?

"You guys literally just got out of a fight," Kurt rubbed his temple, "what happened now?" He asked.

"We're not fighting. I just feel like he's being too distant lately." Rachel said.

"He was just here a minute ago."

Rachel rolled her eyes, "I just feel like he isn't really there whenever we're together. It's like he's somewhere else; his mind is somewhere else," she paused and looked at Kurt, "Do you get what I'm saying?" she asked.

Kurt nodded, "Maybe he's worrying too much about the wedding. Besides, he's probably too focused on the show he's directing."

"I just feel like he isn't making that much of an effort in showing his love to me anymore." Rachel said quietly.

"I don't think he's the one who should be making all the effort in the relationship. Maybe you've been acting the same way too but you just don't know it so he's probably worrying about your behavior himself." Kurt said.

"You're right." That was all Rachel can say.

"You really need to stop worrying too much. Things will turn out the way it was meant to be turned out." Kurt said trying to comfort his best friend.

Rachel smiled weakly.

"Do you want to go shopping to get your mind off things?" Kurt asked.

Rachel grew excited, "Sure, I'll just get ready." She said before she made her way to her room.

Rachel thought about what Kurt said for a whole day. Maybe they just needed to create that spark they felt when they got back together for the second time. When they decided to try their relationship again, it took time for both of them to actually feel something. The love they used to feel with each other when they were dating back in high school didn't come back in an instant. Rachel once asked Jesse if that was a sign that they weren't meant to be together but he told her that it was impossible to feel love for someone instantly even if it dies for a while. Rachel wanted to tell him that love never dies but she couldn't; sometimes she just couldn't speak what's really on her mind with Jesse.

Rachel asked Jesse if he wanted to spend the day with her because she desperately wanted the emptiness that she was feeling to go away. She was happy when Jesse agreed and said that he will be over right away. They spent the whole day watching movies and when dinnertime rolled by, Jesse took her out to Sardi's. Rachel can't help but remember the time Finn took her here when they went to New York for the first time with the rest of the glee club to compete for Nationals. She remembered how she got butterflies in her stomach when she saw Finn wearing a suit, holding a bouquet of flowers. It was one of her favorite memories.

Jesse paid for the bill as soon as he and Rachel were both done with their meals. Jesse decided he wanted to go back to the apartment. Even though Rachel wanted to spend more time out, she obliged not wanting to have another useless argument with Jesse.

* * *

Jesse crashed his lips to Rachel as soon as the both entered the apartment.

"I miss you so much" he said as he started unbuttoning her white long sleeved blouse.

Rachel didn't respond, she just continued to kiss Jesse with passion. She moaned when Jesse started sucking on her neck. "Jesse," she said breathlessly as she tugged on his shirt, "I want your shirt off"

Jesse detached his lips from her neck, and took off his shirt with a smirk on his face before placing his lips onto Rachel's slipping his tongue into her mouth and sucked on her lower lip lightly, giving her a French kiss.

"Bedroom," she mumbled through the kiss.

Rachel squealed as Jesse picked her up bridal style and carried her into the bedroom.

They were both lying down in each other's arms, their naked bodies were covered by the blanket; Rachel was wide-awake while Jesse was fast asleep. Rachel stroked Jesse's arm that was wrapped around her, as she was lost in her own thoughts. Sex with Jesse was great, it feels good, and Rachel wouldn't deny that. But something was bothering her and she doesn't know why she's been feeling so bothered, lately. Rachel looked at Jesse who was peacefully sleeping and sighed, "I love you" she whispered before she forced herself to sleep.

She woke up the next morning alone. She thought Jesse was in the kitchen making her pancakes just like last time. She checked the kitchen after she placed on a robe to cover herself up; she was disappointed to see the kitchen was empty. When Rachel went back to her bedroom, she noticed there was a note on the side table. It read:

**_I'm sorry you had to wake up without me by your side, I have a flight to catch. I'm visiting my mother in Lima if you were wondering. I'll see you soon. - Jesse_**

Rachel frowned at the note. Why didn't he bother to ask her if she wanted to come? Rachel would have loved to see Jesse's mom. She angrily crumpled up the note and threw it across the room.

She sighed as she started getting ready for the day.

After a long day of rehearsals, Rachel decided she wanted to spend some time with Kurt and Santana since Jesse was gone and she felt lonely. So she invited both of her best friends for dinner. She also invited Finn who said that he'll be over in 20 minutes making Rachel smile wide.

"Since when was he a part of our trio?" Kurt asked with a slightly raised voice.

"It wouldn't be a trio anymore if we added him." Rachel pointed out.

"Rachel," Kurt groaned in annoyance as he watched her set 4 plates on the dining table.

"Oh come on Kurt, he's your brother." Rachel said.

"_Step _brother." Kurt corrected.

Rachel rolled her eyes as she placed a set of spoon and fork by each plate, "Why are you acting as if he did something wrong? And I thought you guys were over that stage of hating your step sibling a long time ago?" She asked.

"He abandoned us!" Kurt exaggerated.

"Don't be dramatic, Kurt. He just drifted apart from us." Rachel said.

Kurt sighed in defeat, "But don't you think it's a bit odd he wanted to get close again ever since you announced your engagement with Jesse?"

Rachel paused for a moment to think about what he just said. Was he trying to tell her something? Rachel furrowed her eyebrows. "Well-"

Before Rachel can continue, Santana entered the dining room, "Hey guys what's for dinner?" she asked cutting Rachel off.

"Lasagna." Rachel answered hoping Kurt will drop the conversation they were having.

"Oh that smells great!" Santana took a seat and noticed the table was set for four. "Jesse's here?" Santana asked.

"No, he flew to Lima to visit him mom." Rachel answered.

"Is there a reason why?" Santana asked.

Rachel shrugged, "Maybe he just misses her."

"That doesn't sound like Jesse." Santana scoffed.

Rachel threw her a look.

"The extra plate is for Finn" Kurt said interrupting their little conversation.

Santana was about to speak but was interrupted by the knock on the door.

"He's here!" Rachel exclaimed as she rushed to the front door.

Kurt narrowed his eyes watching Rachel rush out, "She seems happy to be in Finn's presence" Kurt said to Santana.

"A little bit too happy." Santana added.

"Do you think…" Kurt trailed off thinking whether he should finish what he was about to say, or not.

"Do I think what?" Santana asked curiously.

"Do you think there's something going on between them?" Kurt asked quietly.

"Do you think Rachel would do that to Jesse? She's way too blinded for him to do that." Santana scoffed.

"You're right." Kurt frowned.

When Rachel entered the living room with Finn by her side, both Kurt and Santana plastered a convincing smile.

"Oh Finn! What a surprise!" Santana said with fake enthusiasm.

"Be nice Santana." Rachel warned.

"Relax, Finn knows I'm joking, right Finn?"

"Yeah don't worry, Rach." Finn said.

For some reason, Rachel's heart skipped when Finn called her by her old nickname he hasn't used in a _very _long time. An old familiar feeling started taking over her making her feel overwhelmed by it.

"L-Lets sit" Rachel stuttered as motioned Finn to take a seat causing Kurt and Santana to exchange looks.

Dinner was pleasant for both Rachel and Finn. While Santana and Kurt were too busy, observing the way Rachel and Finn interacted with each other. Rachel got annoyed when she noticed both of her friends constantly looking at her and Finn.

"You can take a picture, it'll last longer." Rachel snapped causing both Kurt and Santana to look away quickly.

"The lasagna was really good" Finn complimented trying to break the tension he felt.

Rachel smiled, "Thank you Finn I'm really glad you came."

"I'm glad you invited me." Finn returned her smile.

A realization hit Kurt as he observed Finn and Rachel's actions towards each other. The way they looked at each other, the way they exchanged smiles, that look of despair he tried to hide when Rachel talked about how she's excited to start a new life with Jesse all made Kurt's suspicions definite. "Well, I had a good time," He suddenly said as he stood up from the chair and looked at Finn, "Let's go." He said.

Finn furrowed his eyebrows, "Wait what?" he asked giving Kurt a very confused look.

"I said let's go." Kurt said a little louder.

"But-"

Before Finn could finish, he felt Kurt grabbing him by the arm making him stand up.

"I'd love to stay but we," Kurt pointed at himself and Finn, "gotta go, bye." He said quickly before he walked away pulling Finn with him. Finn managed to wave to Rachel giving her an apologetic look as he allowed Kurt to drag him by the arm.

Rachel frowned, "What was that about?" she asked Santana who was still eating.

Santana just shrugged as she took the last bit of her lasagna, "This is really good." She managed to say with her full mouth.

"Don't talk with your mouth full!" Rachel scolded.

Santana rolled her eyes and swallowed the contents in her mouth, "Come on," she stood up from her seat, "I'll help you clean up."

* * *

The taxi ride to Kurt's place was very silent and awkward. Kurt had an angry look every time Finn would glance at him. Finn was confused. Did he do something wrong? Once the taxi brought them to their designation, Kurt paid for the ride before they quickly got off.

Once the were out of the taxi, Finn began to speak, "Kurt why did you-"

Kurt placed his index finger to his lips silencing him. He led Finn into his apartment and the moment the both got in, he started to yell.

"What do you think you're doing Finn?" Kurt yelled with his voice very high.

Finn was taken aback, "I don't know you were the one who dragged me out!" He yelled back.

Kurt's frustration grew. "Finn," his voice was very stern, "Rachel is _engaged_" Kurt reminded him causing Finn's temper to boil up.

"And do you think I don't know that?" Finn snapped.

"You can't mess with someone who's engaged, Finn. Things will get really messy and Rachel doesn't need anymore mess in her life."

Finn looked at Kurt. _What the hell does he mean by that? _He gave Kurt a very baffled look as he tried to think of a response to what he just said.

"Huh?" that was all Finn could say.

"Oh for god's sake Finn!" Kurt threw his hands up, "You," he pointed at Finn, "lost Rachel a long time ago, don't try to get her now when she's someone else's fiancée!" he yelled.

"Are you assuming that there's something's going on between us?" Finn's voice was low and dark as he tried to keep his temper in check.

"Well is there something going on between you two?!"

"No!"

Kurt took a few deep breaths thinking if he should ask the question that was fresh on his mind. After a few seconds of silence, Kurt composed himself and finally asked the question he's been itching to ask Finn for a while now.

"Do you still love her?"

Finn felt like time suddenly froze as soon as the question came out of Kurt's mouth._ No. _He doesn't love her anymore. He is over her. He has moved on just like she has. But why did it feel difficult for Finn to answer a simple question?

Finally, Finn spoke up, "No." he said quietly.

"Are you sure about that?" Kurt asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Yes." He answered hating how weak his voice sounded.

Kurt was unconvinced, "Alright, if you say so."

"Y-Yeah," Finn stuttered and cleared his throat, "So, uh, I'm gonna go now." He said a bit awkwardly.

"Alright, you know your way out." Kurt said rudely.

Finn rolled his eyes as he made his way out of Kurt's apartment. Why did he assume that there was something going on between him and Rachel? Were they both acting like a couple obviously trying to hide a relationship? They're both just friends who are bonding. Finn also didn't understand why Kurt was so angry at him. He already told him that he doesn't love Rachel anymore. Isn't that what Kurt wanted to hear? Finn let out a heavy sigh.

* * *

_"__I love you so much Finn" Rachel said. Her voice was filled with love._

_Finn smiled at how blissful she looked. They were lying down in the middle of the football field; his arm was wrapped around her shoulder and her head was rested on his, their fingers were intertwined. They both were looking up at the cloudy sky, cloud-gazing. _

_Finn looked at her lovingly and said, "I love you forever."_

* * *

Finn tried to shake off the memory that just flashed through his mind. Why did he keep getting flashbacks on when they were together? It was frustrating him.

Finn was taking a cab back to his own apartment since he was too tired to walk. _You don't love her anymore _Finn reminded himself. He leaned his head back and closed his eyes; _you don't love her anymore _He repeated in his mind.

_You do not love her _He tried to convince himself one more time. But he failed to feel convinced.

* * *

**Thank you guys for following this story, I'm glad to know that people are actually interested. I also appreciate the reviews and favorites.**

**I hope you guys like this chapter. **


	4. Her Heart's Keeper

**_"So open your eyes and see the way our horizons meet, and all of the lights will lead into the night with me, and I know these scars will bleed, but both of our hearts believe _****_all of these stars will guide us home" _**

**_-All Of The Stars by Ed Sheeran._**

* * *

Finn busied himself with work trying to forget about the conversation he had with Kurt. He's been avoiding Rachel for a week because he knew whenever she invited him to come over, Kurt would be there and Rachel might notice the tension between them. Finn doesn't want Rachel to know what he and Kurt talked about. But what if Kurt tells her? Finn's never going to forgive Kurt if he does, he reassured himself that he's over her.

"Mr. Hudson?"

Snapping out of his own thoughts, Finn answered, "Yes Kyle?"

"Are you okay you seem distracted." The dirty blonde hair boy said.

"I'm fine," he faked a smile, "Why not you guys start from the top."

Finn's mind would usually be relaxed whenever he listens to his students play the music they compose with their instruments, but he can't seem to focus on anything. Is he making this whole situation a bigger deal than it is? His mind was going crazy.

Kurt called Finn later that day wanting to meet him somewhere so he can apologise to him personally, Finn simply told him he was busy. He just wanted to be alone.

"He told me he's busy" Kurt said with a hint of irritation.

"With what?" Santana asked.

Kurt shrugged, "He just told me he's busy."

"He's probably avoiding you because maybe what you said is true." Santana said.

Kurt invited Santana over to tell her everything that he and Finn talked about that night and explained to her why he dragged Finn out of that apartment. Santana told Kurt that she isn't blind, she saw it too.

"Do you think Rachel is making a mistake?" Kurt asked.

"I honestly don't know. I hate to admit it but, her and Jesse looks like love each other." Santana answered.

Kurt sighed, "So? Remember when you thought you were so in love with Dani? Look who you ended up with now."

"Yeah, I was heartbroken. I wasn't thinking clearly I just wanted to get over Brittany." Santana said with a roll of her eyes.

"And why do you think Rachel decided to try again with Jesse four years ago?" Kurt didn't wait for Santana to answer, "Because she was heartbroken and she wanted a distraction from Finn." He said.

"True, but if she didn't love Jesse like how she says she does, she would've left him a long time ago." Santana pointed out.

"Okay maybe she does love Jesse, but I doubt she loves him the way she loves Finn."

Santana furrowed her eyebrows; "Do you really think Rachel and Finn are falling for each other again?"

"No," Kurt paused for a moment, "I don't think they ever stopped. They just lost their ways." Kurt said.

"Well isn't that great." Santana said sarcastically.

"Just because they're lost, that doesn't mean they'll be lost forever." Kurt said.

"But Rachel is too busy planning her wedding, I don't think she has the time to find her way back to her ex-boyfriend"

"Which is why you have to talk to her."

"What? No, I'm not gonna talk to her. Do I look like Dr. Phil to you?"

"Just try to, Santana. She's our best friend who we care about so much."

Santana looked at Kurt with confusion written all over her face. Wouldn't he get annoyed whenever Rachel would invite Finn over? Santana thought he didn't like Finn because of what he did to Rachel those few years ago and now he basically wants them back together? Santana isn't really a big fan of Finn either for what he did, but everybody makes stupid mistakes and you can't hold a grudge forever.

"Fine" she mumbled.

* * *

The first thing Rachel did when she woke up on a Saturday morning was check her wedding binder. She had to visit the florist today to pick out the flowers. Rachel was supposed to shop for her wedding dress but Santana said to reschedule because she had a case to deal with while Kurt flew to Italy for the weekend to attend a fashion show and she didn't want to shop for her dress alone. Nobody does.

Before Rachel left the apartment, she sent out a text to Jesse saying she's about to pick out the flowers and asked how were things with his mom. She waited a while for his reply but when she got none, she headed out.

Rachel didn't really care that Jesse didn't reply, she had a feeling he wouldn't anyway. As Rachel was making her way to the florist, she was digging through her bag looking for her phone so she could call Jesse's mom instead. When she felt her phone finally in her hand, she was about to take it out until she bumped into someone.

"I'm so sorry I wasn't looking." Rachel apologized.

She looked up to the person she bumped into. It was Finn.

"Finn?"

Rachel noticed he was carrying a book. She tilted her head a bit to see what book he was reading.

"Hey" Finn gave her a half smile.

"The Notebook?" Rachel chuckled.

Finn immediately hid the book behind his back with one hand; he rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly with the other. "Uh, yeah I bought it because I lost my old copy." He said.

"It was the only book I got you to read back in high school." Rachel remembered not realizing she said that aloud.

"So where are you headed?" Finn asked wanting to avoid a conversation about memories.

"To meet up with a florist" Rachel smiled widely.

"Oh right for that special day of yours." Finn didn't intend for his words to come out in a bitter way. He instantly felt guilty when he saw the look of hurt in Rachel's face.

"You going alone?" He asked not taking the silence Rachel was giving him.

"Uh yeah," Rachel finally spoke up. "Santana or Kurt couldn't make it."

"What about Jesse?" Finn asked. He managed to hide his bitterness this time.

Rachel shrugged, "He left me a note saying he's in Lima to visit his mom."

"Well I could accompany you," Finn suggested, "If you want me to." He quickly added.

Rachel smiled, "I want you to."

* * *

Finn helped Rachel decide on what kind of flowers to pick. They spent more than an hour looking at different arrangements for the centerpiece since the florist suggested getting a wedding dress before choosing flowers for the bouquet.

Rachel chose a mix of white _phalaenopsis orchids_, _gardenia flowers_, and _gypsophila flowers_ mixed with a little light peach colored _sweetheart roses_ for the centerpieces.

All Finn could notice when he was helping Rachel out was the smile on her face, the way her eyes light up with excitement, and how happy she looks. Finn thought planning weddings causes stress especially for the bride. Well by looking at Rachel, he stands corrected.

"Someone seems like a happy bride-to-be" Finn commented.

Rachel and Finn were on their way to a restaurant since Rachel was hungry and Finn didn't really have anything but half a sandwich so they both agreed to eat together before going their separate ways.

"Well I'm not always like this" Rachel said truthfully.

"Not always like what?" Finn asked confused.

"This excited." Rachel said. "I think this was the first time I felt genuinely excited while planning my wedding. I was never like this when I was with Kurt." She continued.

"It's probably Kurt's complicated ways that causes you wedding stress" Finn joked lightly.

"Yeah, maybe." Rachel giggled.

"I haven't seen Jesse since…" Finn trailed off, he looked at Rachel wondering if he should bring up the fight that happened between them weeks ago, "…the, uh, fight." He finally said. "How are you guys doing?"

"Fine, I guess." Rachel answered.

Finn raised an eyebrow, "You guess?" he asked.

Rachel just shrugged, "Lets eat," she said as she pointed at a restaurant and walked towards it.

Finn gave Rachel a confused look as he trailed behind her. He wanted to know if something was going on but he didn't want to push her so he dropped the topic.

It's not that Rachel was mad at Jesse, she just didn't feel like talking about him or what she feels about their relationship. She was just tired of worrying all the time and she didn't want to burden anymore people with her relationship she's not so certain about anymore. Besides, she's about to spend the rest of her life with him, she shouldn't be bombarded with doubts. Rachel just reminds herself that it's probably just paranoia so she does yoga for 15 minutes to calm her mind.

Rachel asked Finn if he wanted to walk around Central Park, he hesitated a bit before he agreed. He didn't want to avoid Rachel all his life, he already wasted enough time keeping himself away from her.

They walked around for about 15 minutes until Finn suggested to look for an empty bench to sit on when he noticed Rachel was starting to get tired. Once they found a seat, they just looked around at their surroundings in silence. Rachel looked at Finn, her eyes dropped down to the book on his lap.

"So… The Notebook huh?" Rachel smirked.

"Oh come on I thought you forgot about that by now." Finn said.

"It's on your lap," Rachel pointed out, "I didn't think you would like it that much" she giggled.

"It would only be my second time to read it." Finn said in defense.

"Oh whatever. I remember how I made that _our _book back then."

"_Our _book?"

"Yeah. It was my all time favorite Nicholas Spark book _and _movie that I got you to read and watch." Rachel had a proud smile on her face.

"Well you kept giving me that puppy face I couldn't say no to." Finn said causing Rachel to playfully give him her puppy face look.

Finn laughed, "Yup that's the face I couldn't resist."

Rachel giggled.

The wind was blowing through Rachel's hair; she closed her eyes, took a deep breath, and looked up at the sky. "It's such a beautiful day," she said. Finn loved how her voice sounded so relaxed.

"You're beautiful." He didn't know what made him say it, he was just so mesmerized at the sight.

"Wow," Rachel tucked her hair behind her ear, "thank you." she blushed.

Finn looked at Rachel, "You're welcome."

They stayed like that for a moment until Rachel broke the eye contact, "I think I'm gonna now," she cleared her throat.

"Oh, yeah." Finn looked away.

Rachel stood up, "You're not leaving yet?" she asked when Finn remained his position.

He shook his head, "I'm just gonna chill for a little longer."

"Well you gotta stand up so you can give me a hug before I go" Rachel pouted.

Finn chuckled and stood up to give her a hug, "I'll see you soon, I hope"

Rachel nodded as she pulled away, "Yeah, bye Finn" she waved him a goodbye before walking away.

Finn watched her walk away with an adoring smile on his face. He started getting lost in his own thoughts as he sat back down on the bench. He didn't care if Rachel left because of his comment. It was true, anyway. All he can think of was Rachel and how she unknowingly lifted up his mood today.

* * *

When Santana got a call from Rachel who talked about her day with Finn, the first instinct she had was to video call Kurt. She grateful that he was still online, she requested for a video call and waited for him to accept it.

"Hey, Santana."

Santana noticed he looked tired, "What time is it there?"

"Around 10 p.m." he answered.

"Why are you still awake?"

Kurt shrugged, "Did you want to tell me something important?"

"Rachel hung out with Finn today." Santana said.

Kurt sat up, "What did they do?" he asked.

"She told me that she bumped into him while she was on her way to meet the florist so he went with her and helped her decide on what flowers to get, then after that they went for lunch then walked around Central Park, and she even mentioned that he called her beautiful. You should've heard how she sounded like, it's as if she went on her first date." Santana said suddenly out of breath.

"Wow. I actually didn't catch any of that"

"Kurt," Santana groaned.

"Lighten up, I was kidding. Did you talk to her yet?" Kurt asked.

"No not yet."

"What are you waiting for, Santana? Go talk to her!"

"Bu-"

"No buts. Just talk to her." Kurt said cutting her off.

"But Kurt-"

"Listen I have to go now. Good luck. Bye." Kurt said quickly.

And with that, he ended the video call.

Santana sighed and sent Rachel a text,

**_I'm coming over._**

Santana wished both Rachel and Finn would stop ignoring whatever feelings they feel whenever they're together because she doesn't want to deal with any of this. She didn't want Rachel to think she's a crazy controlling friend who doesn't support or respect her relationship because she knows Rachel would probably think of her that way once she confronts her about Finn. Santana didn't want to fight with her best friend, she also doesn't want to upset her. She hopes Rachel will keep her mind open and try to hear her out on what she wants to say to make her realize she's possibly making the biggest mistake of her life by marrying someone who she even feels uncertain with.

Santana, for the very first time, felt nervous because of how would Rachel handle it. Would Rachel handle it the right way or would she kick her out of the apartment and tell her to never speak to her again? Rachel is _very _stubborn and she insists that she's right all the time even though she sometimes isn't. The last thing Santana wants is for this conversation to end on a bad note.

"So I talked to Kurt today." Santana said as she watched Rachel pour her a glass of orange juice.

"Hmm really?" Rachel placed the pitcher down on the coffee table and sat beside Santana on the couch, "How's he doing in Italy? What did you guys talk about? Did he mention anything about getting us something?" she questioned eagerly.

"Woah. Calm down," Santana reached out for the glass of orange juice and took a sip, "We just talked about stuff," she placed the glass back down.

"Be more specific, Santana." Rachel said impatiently.

"Well, uh," Santana mentally cursed her nervousness, "we talked about you."

Rachel furrowed her eyebrows in confusion, "Me?"

Santana nodded.

Rachel waited a few seconds for Santana to elaborate and when she didn't, she spoke up, "Well what about me?" she asked.

Santana looked around to avoid eye contact, "Y'know, stuff." The nervousness was very evident in her voice.

Rachel pursed her lips, "Santana," she hissed. Her patience was wearing thin. "Since when did you get nervous?" she tried to sound playful but she was masked with irritation.

"I just don't want you to hate me," Santana looked at Rachel, "and Kurt." She added quickly.

"I won't, I promise."

Santana raised an eyebrow at her, "Okay…" she started slowly, "Well, Kurt and I have been talking about you and Finn actually."

Silence.

Santana didn't like the look on Rachel's face and how she was just staring at her. "Say something." She said.

"I'm not cheating on Jesse." Rachel stated.

"We aren't accusing you of cheating, Rachel." Santana defended. She was annoyed at Rachel for assuming that they would think of her that way.

"Then what about me and Finn, huh?" Rachel managed to ask in a calm tone.

"Rachel.."

"Just tell me." Rachel snapped.

"Look, I know you would never cheat on Jesse but you can't deny that you feel something whenever Finn is around." Santana said.

"I love Jesse." That's all what Rachel can say because she knows what Santana just said is true. But she loves Jesse, she really does and she can't see herself leaving him.

"Do you still love Finn?" Santana asked.

"I love Jesse," Rachel repeated, "and I'm not leaving him, Santana." She added.

"Jesse can't keep what isn't his, Rachel."

Rachel stayed silent for a moment, "What's that supposed to mean?" she asked quietly.

Santana sighed, "You and Jesse may be together but do you really _have_ each other? Kurt told me how you have this empty feeling inside that's killing you. Rachel, Jesse isn't your heart's keeper, Finn is and it's obvious you still love him."

"My love for Finn is hidden far away, Santana. As in, so far that it can never be found." Rachel said.

"Yes, Rachel. _Hidden._ That means it still exists." Santana said with a grin that irritated Rachel even more.

"Did you not hear what I just said?" Rachel snapped.

Santana rolled her eyes, "Finn loves you. It's so obvious by the way he looks at you, it's really sickening." She scrunched up her nose before she continued, "Don't keep your feelings hidden. You wouldn't wanna settle for less would you?"

"I'm not settling for less. Jesse is a lovely man and he treats me right." Rachel defended.

"I wasn't thinking of Jesse. You thought of him on your own."

Rachel huffed.

"Are you sure you want to marry a guy you feel uncertain with?"

"I think you need to go." Rachel spat at Santana.

"Rachel you need understand what I'm trying to tell you." Santana said with patience.

"And you need to leave."

Rachel stood up, "You know your way out." She said before she stormed out.

Santana buried her face into the palm of her hands and groaned in frustration. She knew she should've waited for Kurt to return from Milan so she didn't have to deal with her stubborn friend _on her own. _

* * *

Rachel stayed up late that night thinking about everything Santana said. If she and Finn were really meant to be together, they'd be the one engaged _now _right? Rachel wonders if she should feel guilty for having such thoughts about Finn. Why can't she stop thinking about him? Why can't she stop comparing her relationship now with her relationship then? She keeps fighting her mind but it keeps on coming back to him. _To Finn._

Rachel hates how messy she feels. Why is it so hard for her to push away unwanted thoughts? She wishes she could ignore everything that Santana told her but she can't. Paranoia starts creeping in and all Rachel wants to do is to disappear.

Suddenly, her phone screen lit up. She reached out for her phone and saw she got a text from Jesse.

**_She's fine. I'll see you soon._**

Rachel completely forgot she texted Jesse this morning, and that she was supposed to call his mom because he wasn't reply. She quickly typed a simple reply.

**_That's nice. When are you coming back? I miss you._**

She placed her phone by her side and rested her head against the pillow. She felt her eyelids getting heavy so she decided to close her eyes while she waited for a reply.

_She was standing in the middle of an empty white room with only a standing mirror in front of her. She sees herself wearing a white slim-fit floor length dress. The long sleeves were lace, and the dress was also backless. Her hair was fixed in a lose braid on the right side of her head. There was a 50-inch long silk tulle veil that was resting on the top of her head, the comb that held the veil was secured with bobby pins so it would stay in place. Her skin was pale white and her lips were pure red. Kind of like Snow White. She couldn't recognize herself as she stared at the mirror._

_"__Are you ready?" She heard someone say. She turned around to see who it was but her vision suddenly became blurry. She didn't reply, she just nodded her head._

_"__I can't believe our baby is getting married!" She heard one of her dads say as she felt an arm loop with hers. She wanted to tell him that her wedding day was still 2 months away but she couldn't find the ability to speak. It's as if she was mute. Her mind started racing._

_How was it her wedding day already?_

_Did she time travel a few months into the future?_

_Why does it feel so stuffy? _

_Confusion crept into her mind as she felt herself walking down a soft carpeted aisle in her bare feet holding a bouquet of flowers. The bouquet of flowers looked exactly like the one Finn gave her when they were in New York for the first time. Her heart beats faster with each step she took that led her closer to the altar. Once she reached the altar, the first thing she noticed was the familiar figure of the guy standing right in front of her. Frustrated because she still couldn't see, she shut her eyes tightly hoping for her clear vision to come back. She panicked when she opened her eyes and looked around her surroundings still not being able to see clearly._

_"__Are you ready to get married?" _

_She froze as she heard his voice she very well recognized. When her vision started to clear, she looked up to finally take a look at her husband-to-be. Her breath hitched when she saw his face. It wasn't Jesse. It was Finn. _

* * *

**I didn't really know how to end this chapter so I'm just gonna end it with that.**

**Thank you guys for reading, reviewing, favoriting, and following this story it's very much appreciated. **


	5. Accepting The Truth

**_"_****_My state of mind has finally got the best of me I need you next to me." _**

**_-Until You're Mine by Demi Lovato_**

* * *

Rachel paced back and forth in her room for the next couple of hours, unable to go back to sleep. She contemplated on calling Santana to tell her about her dream that felt like a nightmare. Was it really a nightmare or was she just scared to face the possible truth about her still being in love with Finn? When Rachel checked her phone to look at the time, she saw a text from Jesse.

**_I'm going to come back. _**

Rachel rolled her eyes, she asked _when_ he's coming back, not _if_ he's coming back. New York is his home so of course he's coming back. Annoyed at his response, Rachel just ignored him. Her mind went back at the dream she just had. She wondered if it was supposed to mean something, or if it was just a pointless dream. But the dreams you get when you fall asleep aren't all pointless. There was obviously a reason why Rachel dreamt about Finn. It was probably because of the conversation she had with Santana, she did think deeply about it before she dozed off to sleep.

The dawn was starting to break; Rachel was sitting on the edge of her queen sized bed. She was too lost in her own thoughts to even notice her bedroom door opening.

"Rachel."

The sound of Jesse's stern voice startled her. She didn't think he would be back this early.

"Jesse?" She frowned at her fiancée's appearance. He looked exhausted and angry. _Angry? Why angry? _"Are you okay?" she asked with concern.

Rachel watched Jesse pull out his phone from his pocket in confusion.

"Explain this to me." He said as her brought his phone up to Rachel's face. It was a picture of her and Finn hugging.

"Where did that picture come from?" She asked even though she knew it was a shot taken by the paparazzi. She had no idea she and Finn were being followed.

"From an article that claimed you were cheating on me!" Jesse yelled.

Rachel looked at him in disbelief, "And you believe that?"

"What were you doing with Finn, huh?"

"We were just hanging out, Jesse. When I was on my way to pick out a flower arrangement for _our _wedding, I bumped into him. He helped me out with the flowers, we ate, then we just hung out afterwards _as friends._" Rachel explained. She tried to be patient with him because she knows he isn't thinking clearly due to his exhaustion.

"Yeah, _friends._" He mocked.

"I would never do to you what you did to me when you went on that trip to Vegas with your friends." Rachel said coldly.

Jesse's eyes darkened. "You promised you would _never _bring that up." He growled.

"I would never cheat on you Jesse! I'm not sleeping with Finn!" Rachel yelled. She didn't notice the tears that were falling from the corner of her eyes.

"God Dammit!" Jesse angrily threw his phone across the room with all his strength. Rachel flinched when the phone clashed into the wall. Jesse walked towards Rachel and gripped her wrist tightly; "You already forgave me for that, you can't use it against me."

Rachel's hands were trembling; the look on Jesse's face scared her to death. "I'm sorry," she said quietly.

Jesse stared into Rachel's fearful eyes for a few seconds before he loosened his grip from her wrist, "I'm sorry too."

Rachel started sobbing. Jesse sat down beside her and wrapped his arms around Rachel, "I am so sorry, baby. I didn't mean to hurt you."

"What's going on Jesse? You've been acting weird lately." Rachel said with a weak voice.

"I know, and I promise you that I'm not sleeping around with anyone. I love you so much and I would _never _do that to you again." He said.

"I didn't think you were, Jesse. Just tell me what's going on with you. You look tired." She said.

"I'm sorry." He apologized again.

"For what?"

"I'm just really sorry."

"It's okay, Jesse."

Jesse began to cry, he unwrapped his arms from Rachel, and he rested both his elbows onto his lap and buried his face into the palm of his hands. "I've messed up. I just want our wedding to be perfect."

Rachel rubbed his back, "And it will be. Don't worry." She kissed the side of his head.

"I love you, Rachel."

"I love you too."

It was last year when he did it. When Jesse went to Vegas and ended up cheating on Rachel. He was very drunk so obviously he didn't have the right state of mind. When he told Rachel, she avoided him for two weeks, she didn't allow him to explain or apologize. When Santana and Kurt asked why she was ignoring Jesse, she simply told them that they just needed space. She never told them about what he did in Vegas.

When Rachel finally allowed Jesse to talk to her, he couldn't stop apologizing. He promised her he would never do it again and told her if he were ever invited to go to Vegas again, he would decline the invite. She of course, forgave him. At first, she felt like forgiving him was a mistake, but he proved how much he really loves her by sending her flowers and chocolate every weekend for a whole month. He even tried to bake her cookies but he burnt them, Rachel laughed at his attempt but she appreciated his effort anyway. Rachel then promised Jesse that she would forget about his mistake and keep it in the past.

It has been almost an hour since their fight; Jesse was fast asleep while Rachel was just watching him sleep. She was running her hands through his hair. For some reason, despite everything that just went down, the dream was still stuck in her mind. Should she tell Jesse that she dreamt about a beautiful wedding? Should she mention she saw Finn's face right before she woke up gasping? Should she even tell anyone about this?

Rachel sighed as she got off the bed to get herself ready for the day.

* * *

"They are so frustrating!" Kurt yelled at Santana who was looking through the pictures the paparazzi took of Rachel and Finn on her phone.

"You said that a million times, Kurt."

"That's because they _are._"

"I think they need a little bit more time. They did have a rough ending." Santana said with a shrug.

Kurt looked at Santana, "You were the one who said they don't have the time. Rachel's wedding is in two months, Santana! _Two!_"

Santana sighed, "Well there's nothing we can do, Kurt. We should just leave all this alone and let whatever happens, happen."

"Don't you want to spare Rachel another broken heart?" Kurt asked.

"Stop assuming that Jesse would leave her, it could be _her _leaving _him._" Santana answered.

"Rachel won't consider leaving Jesse if Finn won't tell her what he really feels about her." Kurt said.

"Damn, I forgot about that. What are we gonna do about his in denial ass?"

"I think I have a brilliant idea." Kurt said with a huge smile on his face.

Kurt called Finn later that day hoping he isn't still angry about the conversation they had a few days ago, he was relieved when Finn agreed to meet up with him for dinner after work. Since it was still early in the afternoon, Kurt decided to pass by Rachel during her rehearsals.

"Kurt!" Rachel ran towards him squealing.

"Why, hello there superstar." Kurt greeted her as he gave her a tight hug.

Rachel led him to her dressing room. She got two bottles of water for herself and Kurt before getting comfortable beside him on the couch.

"How was Milan? You have got to tell me everything!" She exclaimed.

"It was amazing. The city was gorgeous, I love it, and I'm aching to go back already." He said.

"You have got to take me with you, Kurt." She said in a stern, but playful voice.

Kurt chuckled, "Don't worry, I will take you with me one day." He looked at Rachel and noticed a very tired look on her face. "You okay?" he asked with concern.

Rachel yawned, "I didn't really sleep last night and I got into a fight with Jesse early this morning." She replied.

"Wait, Jesse's here? What happened?"

"Yeah, he came back this morning and he saw a picture of me and Finn together."

"Hold on, did he accuse you of cheating?"

"He was tired, Kurt."

Kurt rolled his eyes. Rachel always defends Jesse's actions whenever they fight. It's as if she blames herself for every fight they have. He sighed, "If you say so."

"So I thought we were still gonna see each other on Friday to shop for my dress?" Rachel asked wanting to change the subject.

"Oh, I'm going to meet Finn later for dinner and I just wanted to pass by." Kurt said.

Rachel's eyes lit up when Kurt mentioned Finn's name. It's been awhile since the two have bonded together. She suddenly frowned when she realized she wasn't invited to their little bonding. "Wow, I remember last week you didn't seem to like his presence." Rachel reminded him.

"Somebody's jealous" Kurt said in a singsong voice.

"I am not!" Rachel said a bit too quickly.

"Whatever, I'm gonna get going." Kurt said.

"Tell Finn I said hi"

Kurt gave Rachel a look.

"What?" She asked confused.

"Nothing. I'll see you soon." Kurt kissed the top of her head before exiting the room.

**_6:05 PM_**

Kurt sighed as he stared at the time on his phone. He was tapping his fingers on the table impatiently. His eyes scanned around the restaurant hoping to spot Finn's tall figure but instead he spotted someone else he knew sitting by the window, four tables away from him. Jesse. He wanted to walk over to him but Jesse seemed like he was in a very intense phone call and the last thing Kurt wanted was an attitude from him. Kurt observed Jesse intently as he was yelling at his phone while rubbing his temples in frustration. Kurt tried to hear what Jesse was saying but he couldn't hear well with the loud chatters of the people around him.

"Hey sorry I'm late," Finn said as he sat down on front of Kurt blocking his view from Jesse.

"It's alright. I already ordered for both of us." Kurt smiled.

"Oh, cool thanks."

Finn narrowed his eyes as he watched Kurt trying to look at something behind him. He turned around to see what Kurt was trying to see. His eyes widened when he saw Jesse.

Finn turned back around to his original position, "Where's Rachel?" he asked.

"I don't know. I passed by her rehearsals a while ago. She's probably back at her place resting." Kurt answered.

"So Jesse's alone here?"

"Well you don't see him sitting with anyone do you?"

Finn rolled his eyes when he caught Kurt's sarcasm. "Why did you invite me to dinner, Kurt" he sighed.

"I didn't want to eat alone."

"Really?" Finn asked suspiciously with a raised eyebrow.

"Fine," Kurt sighed in defeat, "Can you do me a favor?"

"Okay…" Finn replied hesitantly.

"Go with me this Friday."

"Where and why?"

"Just go with me, Finn. I promise that you will thank me for this later on."

"But-"

"Finn," Kurt cut Finn off sternly, "Trust me."

Finn raised both his hands in surrender, "Alright, fine."

Both Finn and Kurt started talking about their parents and how they've been doing completely forgetting about Jesse who was getting up from his seat to leave the restaurant with a brunette middle aged woman.

"I am never gonna find a perfect dress," Rachel whined.

"Calm down, Berry." Santana said in annoyance.

"Anything I try on doesn't feel right and I don't know what to do!" Rachel panicked. It was the fourth dress she tried on. Santana said the second one she tried on looked good enough but the dress was above the ankles and Rachel didn't want that, she wanted it to be floor-length. "Where's Kurt? He was supposed to be here an hour ago!"

"He'll be here. Just get that dress off so we can keep looking." Santana said with a roll of her eyes.

When Rachel made her way back to Kurt's dressing room, Santana was about to call Kurt until she heard her name being called from behind. Santana turned around, "Where the hell have you been?" she questioned.

"I'm sorry but it was hard trying to get Finn to come along with me without questions being thrown at my face." Kurt said.

"And why would you bring Finn along? Where is he?"

"Over here." Finn said causing Santana and Kurt to turn around. "Tell me why I'm here with you guys." He demanded.

"Take a chill pill Finn and sit down." Kurt said.

"Kurt," Finn said with a very stern voice, "why am I here."

"Rachel wanted to hang out with us right after her dress shopping." Santana lied. It was easy for her to come up with a lie for Finn to believe.

"Oh."

"Where's Rachel?" Kurt asked looking around the shop.

"Changing room." Santana answered.

"Is she trying on a dress?" Kurt asked with excitement.

"No, she's getting off one. Can you please look for a dress that she would love? She's been looking for you for 45 minutes." Santana said.

"Alright." Kurt said as he walked to a rack of dresses to look through.

Santana sat down beside Finn in the white leather sofa, "How's your day going, Hudson?" Santana asked with a smirk.

"Confusing," Finn answered.

"Finn?"

Finn's head snapped up by the sound of Rachel's voice. "Hey." He greeted with a small wave.

"Uh, hello…" Rachel greeted back with confusion written all over her face.

"He's here so he could hang out with us right after we find your perfect dress." Santana said quickly.

Rachel beamed, "Really?"

Finn nodded, "That's why I'm here."

"Great! This makes me want to find my dress faster." Rachel said with excitement.

"Rachel," Kurt called out interrupting their conversation, "Try this on." He said as he handed her the dress.

"Alright, I'll be back" Rachel walked back into the changing room with a huge grin on her face.

Rachel stepped out of the changing room 30 minutes later wearing an elegant A-line wedding dress with asymmetrical draped bodice. It was strapless and it had a dark blue floral sash wrapped around the waist area.

Time froze for Finn as he stared at Rachel with his mouth agape. He wanted to tell her how beautiful she looked but he was too astonished to even speak. He zoned out from everything around him but Rachel. Finn seeing her smile and glow in the wedding dress she was wearing made his heart beat faster and faster. He couldn't take his eyes of her. Finn's feelings were so strong, he wanted to pick her up and spin her around. He wanted to hold her and never let go. She was all Finn wanted at this very moment.

"So how do I look?" Rachel asked Finn causing him to snap out of his thoughts.

"B-beautiful." He stuttered.

Rachel's cheeks turned into a light shade of red, "So you think this is a perfect dress for my wedding?"

Finn felt his heart drop at her question. He now remembers why he was here, why _she_ was here. He almost forgot she was engaged to someone. "Yeah." Finn answered quietly with a very convincing smile.

"You look stunning Rachel, and it's Vera Wang." Kurt said.

"I agree with Kurt, you look stunning, Mrs. St. James" Santana teased.

"Thank you Santana, I wish I could wear this dress forever. It makes me feel beautiful." Rachel said.

"But you are. With or without that dress on." Finn said.

Kurt and Santana both looked at Finn in shock.

"What?" Finn asked when he noticed Santana and Kurt giving him a weird look.

"Nothing," Santana said. She turned to Rachel, "Want me to help you get out of that dress?" She asked.

"Yes please." Rachel said.

When Rachel and Santana went into the changing room, Finn spoke up.

"Is that why you brought me here." Finn said.

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Don't bullshit me, Kurt."

"I really don't know what you're talking about!"

Finn paused for a moment taking in a deep breath, "I told you how I felt when I saw Rachel wearing her wedding dress back in the time we were about to get married, I told you how strong my feelings were and how I thought of my future that I was supposed to have with Rachel. I think you know what I'm talking about."

Kurt sighed in defeat. "Alright, fine. I just wanted to see if you would still feel that way if you saw her in a wedding dress again, and I think I know my answer."

"She's getting married, Kurt."

"Then tell her how you feel."

"I don't feel anything for her."

"You are literally the most frustrating human being in this earth, Finn."

Finn didn't respond. He didn't want to have another argument with Kurt.

The rest of the day rolled by slowly for Finn. He barely payed attention to any of the conversation they were having. He was lost in his own world, thinking about one person. And that person is Rachel. He felt a bit bad for thinking about her so much because if Rachel was his fiancée, and he finds out someone else is thinking about her the way he is now, he wouldn't be too happy about it. But Finn couldn't help thinking about her, he couldn't help thinking about the future with Rachel he imagined when they were still in high school. Finn wonders why he still couldn't let it go. It's been years.

When Rachel said she had to go back to Jesse, Santana and Kurt decided to get going as well. Before Kurt was about to leave, Finn asked him if the could talk. Kurt agreed so he followed Finn and they both made their way to Finn's apartment.

"You're right, Kurt."

"About what?"

Finn rolled his eyes then sighed, "I still love her."

"It's about time you learned to accept the truth," Kurt said.

"Well, it kinda sucks that I love her because I'm loving someone who's completely off limits."

Kurt sighed, "I said this once, I'll say it again; Tell her how you feel before it's too late."

And with that, Kurt made his way out of Finn's apartment leaving Finn alone to carefully think about the decision he needs to make.

* * *

Rachel had a great day today, she felt herself blushing as she remembered what Finn said about her being beautiful whether she was wearing the breath taking wedding dress or not. Rachel unlocked the door to her apartment and went inside. She called out Jesse's name, but she only got silence in return. She hasn't seen Jesse in two days. She honestly thought they'd be okay after they made up from their fight when he came back. It was weird how Jesse has been distancing himself from her ever since she announced their engagement to her friends.

"Jesse?" She called again. She checked her bedroom only to see it empty.

Rachel let out a heavy sigh. She thought he would spend another night at her place. When she heard a knock on the front door, she rushed to open it hoping it was Jesse standing by her door.

It wasn't. Instead, it was his mother.

"Miranda! What a surprise!" Rachel said with enthusiasm.

"Hello, dear." She greeted Rachel with a kiss on each cheek.

"What are you doing here? Jesse isn't here." Rachel said.

"I wanted to see my future daughter-in-law of course! And where is my son? I haven't seen him in so long."

Rachel furrowed her eyebrows, "I don't know where he is. But wait, how long are you talking about? When was the last time you've seen Jesse?" she asked.

"The last time I saw him was when the both of you announced your engagement." Miranda answered.

Rachel stayed quiet. Anger was coursing through her, but she managed not to show it.

"Is there a problem, dear?" Miranda asked with concern.

"No," Rachel lied.

"Alright, well I'll just see the both of you tomorrow. I will make reservations for the three of us in Sardi's."

Rachel smiled, "Okay. Thanks for passing by, Miranda."

When Miranda left, Rachel went straight to her bedroom and buried her face into a pillow. She screamed, and she cried. She was angry with Jesse for lying. She hated being lied to. When Jesse came back angry and exhausted, Rachel thought he had a fight with his mom. She now wonders why he acted that way now that she knows he didn't really visit his mom. Two questions were lingering at the back of Rachel's mind.

_Where did he go, and why did he lie? _

* * *

**I'm glad you guys enjoyed the previous chapter. And for those who are asking about Jesse, I don't want to make him a completely bad guy, there will be an explanation to why he's been acting weird in the later chapters, but for now I'll have to leave you guys guessing. **

**I hope you guys like this chapter even though I don't feel like it's my best.**

**Anyway, thank you for the reviewing and following this story. **


	6. Somewhere Only We Know

_**"Strong enough to leave you, but weak enough to need you, cared enough to let you walk away..." **_

_**- In Case by Demi Lovato**_

* * *

Rachel stayed in bed for the whole morning the next day. Her eyes were puffy red and her nose was stuffed. She didn't call Jesse and confront him for lying because honestly, Rachel didn't want to know what was going on. She doesn't know if she should believe him when he said he wasn't cheating because what reason does he have to lie to her? She forced herself out of bed because she needed to get ready for lunch with Miranda and Jesse. Rachel wonders if Miranda was able to get Jesse to come since he seems to be a lot busy with whatever is keeping him distant.

"Over here, darling!" Rachel saw Miranda raising her hand waving it a bit to catch her attention when she entered the restaurant. She made her way over at the table where Miranda was sitting. "Hi," Rachel greeted as she pulled out a chair to sit on, "Is Jesse coming?" She asked.

"Yes, didn't he tell you?" Miranda asked.

Rachel shook her head, "No."

"Oh he must've forgotten. He told me he'll call you last night." Miranda said.

"Well, he didn't." Rachel answered bitterly.

Miranda reached out for Rachel's hand and gave her a comforting squeeze. She could tell there was something going on between them. She just hopes it's not a major fight that wouldn't be resolved before their wedding.

"Hello ladies," Jesse greeted giving his mom a kiss on the cheek. He sat beside Rachel and placed his arm around her, "Did you order for me?" he asked Rachel.

"I did," Miranda said cutting in.

"So what did you guys want to tell me?" Jesse asked.

Both Rachel and Miranda looked at Jesse confused.

"What do you mean, Jesse?" Rachel asked harshly.

Jesse gritted his teeth, "I have things to do." He snapped.

"I called you because I wanted to spend some time with the both of you," Miranda said calmly.

"That's it?" Jesse questioned.

"Yes, considering you haven't seen your mom since we announced our engagement," Rachel snapped.

"Rachel…"

"No! I'm sick of you lying to me!" Rachel yelled. She didn't care about the stares and looks she caused from the people around her.

"What's going on?" Miranda asked.

"I honestly don't know," Rachel stood up and looked at Miranda, "I'm sorry I have to go."

Jesse sighed deeply as he watched Rachel walk away.

"Can you please tell me what's gong on?" Miranda asked again.

"I don't know, Ma. She's been moody lately."

"Talk to her."

"I have important things to deal with right now."

"Do you want to lose your fiancée?"

"Of course not."

"Then talk to her, _now._"

* * *

Finn has been worrying that Kurt might tell Rachel about his confession; he was annoyed and mad when he got a call from Santana saying Kurt told her about their talk after they spent the together. What would he do if Kurt or even Santana told Rachel about how he really feels about her? Would that ruin their friendship? Would she never want to talk to him again? Finn didn't want that. At this point, he doesn't really care if she's with Jesse or with any other man in this world, he just doesn't want to lose her more than he already has. Living life without Rachel in the picture felt so impossible for Finn. Whether she's his wife, girlfriend, or even just a friend, he wants her to be a part of his life somehow.

When Finn heard someone banging on his front door, he immediately got up from his bed and fixed his messy hair before he rushed to the door. He wasn't expecting to see anyone today, he thought it was just Santana or Kurt trying to get him to confess his feelings to Rachel. He was more than surprised to see _Rachel_ standing on the other side of his door when he opened it. It was obvious Rachel has been crying and all Finn wanted to do was to wrap her around his arms but he didn't want to make things awkward or make her feel uncomfortable.

"Rachel? What happened? What's wrong?" Finn questioned. He wanted to know if Jesse made her cry _again. _

"I didn't want to go to Kurt or Santana. I don't want them to hate Jesse, more than they already do. I just don't know what's going on between us. I thought we were okay but we're not," Rachel sobbed.

Finn walked closer to her and rubbed her back trying to get her to calm down, "Shhhh it's okay. Come on, let's go inside."

Finn led Rachel to his couch and motioned her to sit down, "Do you want anything?"

Rachel shook her head in response.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Finn asked as he sat down beside her.

"Jesse lied to me. He said he left to go visit his mom but his mom told me she hasn't seen him since the night we announced our engagement.. Do you think he's cheating on me?"

"Well he's probably doing something that might upset you," Finn said dumbly. He honestly didn't know what to say.

"Yeah, which is cheating."

"I think you should just talk to him. You shouldn't be scared to speak up to your loved ones."

"I am when it comes to Jesse."

Finn furrowed his eyebrows, "Why?"

"When he gets angry, he tends to become really intense."

"Rachel does he…"

Rachel's eyes widened, "Oh no! He would never do that to me, I'm sorry that came out the wrong way."

"Good, I was close to going over to his place to beat him up." Finn joked trying to lighten up Rachel's mood.

Rachel giggled, "I don't really want to talk about my stupid problems anymore."

"They're not stupid."

"I want to talk to you," Rachel said desperately wanting to change the subject.

Finn's anxiety grew. What did Rachel want to talk to him about? Did Kurt tell her? "A-about what?" he stuttered out.

Rachel shrugged, "I don't know, anything."

"Oh," Finn sighed in relief.

"You okay?" Rachel asked.

"Yeah," Finn cleared his throat, "I'm trying to come up with a fun assignment for my kids this week. Maybe you want to help me out?"

Rachel smiled, "I'd love to."

* * *

Rachel spent an hour helping Finn with what to assign his kids for music class. Her bad mood that Jesse caused was all gone and forgotten. Rachel's day got even better when Finn brought up a challenge that he could make cookies as good as hers. Now, they are on the kitchen floor with batter covered all over them.

"I had a bad feeling about this from the start," Rachel giggled.

"Well my cookies were going great until you _purposely _threw batter on my face." Finn said.

Rachel playfully rolled her eyes, "It wasn't that much!"

Finn scraped some batter from Rachel face with his fingers, "It's not bad," He said as he licked his fingers.

"I'm scared to try it." Rachel joked making Finn nudge her lightly.

"You're just scared to try cookies that are better than yours."

Rachel ignored Finn's comment and giggled, "Let's clean up before we start another food fight."

Finn helped Rachel up from the ground. He turned around reaching for the cup of milk and poured it all over Rachel, "Too late"

"_Finn Hudson!" _Rachel hissed.

"Whoops?"

Rachel tried to grab for the bowl of flour to dump on Finn, but he picked her up before she could grab the bowl, and carried her on his shoulder.

"Put me down Finn Hudson!"

"I will if you ask nicely"

"Please put me down!"

"Alright," Finn said as he gently placed Rachel down.

"We need to clean up," Rachel said. Her hands were on Finn's chest while his arms were still wrapped around her waist.

"Nah it's cool, I'll take care of the kitchen. You can shower here if you want."

"It's okay, I'll just go back to my place. I uh, have to call Jesse anyway. Do you have a towel I can borrow?"

"Oh," Finn unwrapped his arms from Rachel's waist, "yeah, I do. Hang on just a sec."

Finn rushed to the bathroom to grab a clean towel and went back to Rachel, who was leaning on the kitchen counter with her elbow, and handed it to her.

"Are you sure you don't want me to help you out? I'm not in a rush," Rachel said as she wiped her face and arms with the towel Finn gave her.

"It's okay. Don't worry." Finn assured Rachel giving her a convincing smile.

Rachel frowned. Finn thinks he could fool everyone making them think he's okay, but not Rachel. "If you're sure," she said.

"I am."

"Alright see you later," Rachel leaned closer to Finn's face and placed a light kiss on his cheek before she walked over to the living room to get her things and go.

* * *

Rachel's mood instantly dropped when she entered her apartment to a very pissed off fiancée. She was sick and tired of being sick and tired. She was so sick and tired of Jesse and his bullshit.

"Where the hell have you been?! I've been calling you!" Jesse yelled.

"My phone was on silent. I'm sorry." Rachel replied in a calm tone.

"Where were you Rachel?"

"At Finn's."

Jesse laughed bitterly, "Are you _fucking _serious?!"

"What's so wrong with that?! At least I'm not a liar!"

Silence filled Rachel's apartment as Jesse ran his fingers through his hair with frustration. He didn't mean to get mad at Rachel but he couldn't stand the thought of her being all friendly with her ex-boyfriend.

"You wouldn't understand, Rachel."

"Try me."

When Jesse didn't respond after a minute, Rachel completely lost her temper.

"Do you still want to marry me, Jesse?! Tell me now!" Rachel yelled.

"Can you stop? Just stop! Everything I'm doing, I'm doing it for _you_- for _us!_"

"Then fucking tell me what you're god damn doing I can't take it anymore!"

Jesse stood still as he stared into his fiancée's tearful eyes. He hates seeing her cry, and he hates how he was the reason to why she's crying. He wanted to come up with another lie, but he knew that this was the last straw for Rachel. If he crosses another line, it's all over. She's going to be gone for good. He wanted to tell her, but he couldn't find the courage to tell her the truth because she might still leave him. The situation Jesse is in right now is very complicated and he's doing his best to fix it so he can live the rest of his life with Rachel in peace.

"I love you so much, Rachel. I know it's hard to believe me right now, but I do mean it," Jesse said sincerely.

"That doesn't answer my question."

"Please baby, I'm doing my best to fix my mess."

Rachel ignored Jesse's pleading eyes that would usually cause her to give in to him. "Answer me now, Jesse. Or I'm leaving."

* * *

Finn couldn't stop smiling, he stayed up that night thinking about the day he had with Rachel and the kiss on the cheek she gave him. He won't deny the tingly feeling he got when she pressed her lips against his cheek. The look Rachel gave him before she left was the same look she would give him when they were dating. It gave Finn hope that Rachel would go back to him if he makes her realize that she really belongs to him. He didn't want to straight up tell Rachel about his feelings, though. They were still working on their friendship that they just regained, and Finn didn't want to freak Rachel out.

Before Finn went to work the next day, he went to get Rachel a bouquet of flowers. He is currently standing at her front door. He's so nervous that his hands were sweaty, and his heart was beating so fast he feels like it's going to explode any second now. It took him a minute to finally build up the courage to knock on her door. It took a few minutes before the door was answered. Finn felt his heart drop when it was Jesse, not Rachel.

"May I help you?" Jesse asked.

"Uh, yeah, I'm looking for Rachel."

"She's sleeping."

Finn looked at Jesse suspiciously, "But it's 10 o'clock, she's supposed to be up by now," he said.

"Yeah well, we were both up all night last night so she's really exhausted," Jesse said with a grin that made Finn want to punch him in the face.

"Oh," Finn swallowed thickly, "I just wanted to give her some flowers to thank her for helping me out yesterday," he said giving the bouquet to Jesse.

"Sure," Jesse said as he got the bouquet from Finn's hands before turning around and closing the door.

Finn let out a heavy sigh. All he wanted to do was to get out of New York and spend some time alone. When Finn went to work, he asked the principal if he could have some days off, he made an excuse saying he needed to go back to Lima to take care of his sick mom. When the principal granted his request, Finn patiently went through his day with his kids even though he wasn't really in the mood to teach.

When Finn got home, he went through the box where he kept the engagement ring he gave to Rachel when they were in high school. He never had the heart to sell it or throw it away. It was the only piece of her he has left. Finn knows he couldn't keep holding on to such hope that she'd eventually come back. He knows that he has to let it go because he can't be stuck in the past forever where Rachel was crazy in love with him. What if she really moved on and all those body languages are actually just platonic? Finn stared at the diamond ring that he wished he had the courage to just throw away.

Finn packed his bags later that evening, thankful he was able to get an overnight flight to Lima. He knows he should face his problems instead of running away from it but he can't help it. There was a part of him that believes there's still a chance to get her back, but the bigger part of him is telling him to let her go. But what if Rachel isn't truly happy with Jesse? She did say there are times she's afraid to speak up to Jesse when she shouldn't be. A couple should have that freedom to speak their mind with each other without any fear. Finn didn't know if he should fight for her, or just let her go. His mind was having conflict with itself, which is why he needed a time off.

Carole and Burt were surprised at Finn's unexpected, not to mention late, arrival. Carole asked her son if there was a reason why he came here without notice, Finn just shrugged and said he wanted a break from the busy city. Since the dawn was about to break, Finn took a drive around Lima. He didn't feel too tired since he slept during the whole plane ride.

Finn stopped by the lake he would always go with Rachel whenever they wanted to hide from the world. It was like it was their own secret place; only Finn never brought anyone there and neither did Rachel. Whenever Rachel's dads were on a business trip, Finn would take her here at night and they would just slow dance under the moon light with music made up in their heads. Finn lay down on the grass and closed his eyes enjoying the peacefulness you couldn't get in New York City until there was a sound of a girl crying that interrupted his peaceful state of mind. Finn furrowed his eyebrows as he stood up to look around. When he spotted a girl sitting by a tree with her face buried in her hands, he stood still. Finn didn't feel like hearing the problems of a random stranger, but that stranger seemed so familiar to Finn so he walked closer to her. He tapped on the girl's shoulder, causing her to look up.

Finn's breath hitched when he saw her face. He wonders why she's been crying a lot, lately. More importantly, he wanted to know what she was doing here, and how long she has been staying here in Lima. Finn was too confused to even notice how broken she looked.

"Rachel," Finn finally spoke up, "what are you doing here?"

* * *

**This chapter is a bit short, it took time for me to write this since I've already been working on another story. I think this story has a few more chapters till it's done. **

**Thank you for all the reviews I hope you enjoyed this chapter. **


	7. Letting Her Go

_**"And if you have a minute why don't we go**_

_**Talk about it somewhere only we know**_

**_This could be the end of everything_**

**_So why don't we go somewhere only we know"_**

**_-Somewhere Only We Know by Keane_**

* * *

When Rachel heard Finn's voice, relief coursed through her body since the severe loneliness she was feeling was slowly killing her. Even though she was confused to why he's here, she's glad he was. Rachel quickly wiped her tears and allowed Finn to help her stand up from the ground, "What are you doing here?" she asked.

"I asked you first," Finn grinned.

Rachel rolled her eyes then shrugged, "I don't know, I just really need a break."

"Well it's almost 6 o'clock, do you maybe wanna grab some breakfast with me?" Finn asked.

"Oh, my dads are expecting me to eat breakfast with them. My papa was awake when I left the house, he told me to be back by breakfast," Rachel said, "But you can eat with us if you want to," she quickly added.

"Only if they won't mind…"

Finn didn't really want to have breakfast with Rachel if her dads were going to be there. When Finn and Rachel were together, they used to adore him for making their daughter happy, but Finn is scared of what they think of him now. He was scared of what they think about the man who pushed their daughter away leaving her broken hearted. Finn doesn't want to know.

"I'm sure they won't," Rachel smiled, "Do you think I can ride with you? Since I just jogged all the way here." She said.

"Really?" Finn asked with a raised eyebrow.

Rachel giggled, "Why is it hard to believe?"

"I can barely run up a flight of stairs!" Finn said with exaggeration.

"Shut up," Rachel said playfully as she nudged the side of his stomach.

Finn chuckled then gently grabbed Rachel's hand, "Come on let's go have breakfast."

The car ride back to Rachel's place was full of singing and laughter. Rachel kept trying to make Finn sing along with her to the songs that play on the radio but the way he keeps shaking his head shyly makes Rachel laugh at how adorable he was being. It only took 30 minutes to get to the house, Finn wished it took longer because he didn't want an end to the sound of Rachel's laughter.

"Finn– you okay?" Rachel asked Finn noticing he was fidgeting with his hands under the table.

"Just nervous," He mumbled truthfully.

"There's nothing to be nervous about," Rachel assured Finn.

"But your dads' probably-" Finn stopped talking when one of Rachel's dads' entered the dining room.

Finn immediately stood up when LeRoy greeted him, "Hello sir," he greeted back as he gave him a firm handshake.

"Long time no see," LeRoy said.

Finn nodded, "Yeah I've been busy." It wasn't a complete lie, he's been busy but not necessarily with his teaching job, but with other people and Rachel's dad definitely doesn't need to know that.

"Well I'm glad to see you Finn."

Rachel cleared her throat reminding her dad that she was still in the room, "Seems like you're more excited to see Finn than you were to see me when I arrived last night."

LeRoy chuckled and gave his daughter a kiss on the forehead, "I was excited to see you, but I was just too tired to show it," he said, "Oh and by the way, your papa had to leave early he had an emergency meeting," he informed.

"Oh," Rachel frowned, "will you guys be busy the whole week? I really wanted to spend time with the both of you."

"Most probably, sweetheart. But maybe after your honeymoon with Jesse. I know you want to spend time with us while before you become Mrs. St James," LeRoy managed to hold back his tears when he said that. He still couldn't grasp the thought of his only daughter getting married. "But it won't make any difference if you spend time with us – married or not – you're always going our little girl. I just hope you wont rush to have a baby, that would be too much to sink in right after a wedding."

Finn took a deep breath as he listened to what LeRoy was saying. Was it bad that he hopes the wedding won't push through? Was it too selfish for him to want Rachel all to himself even if he doesn't deserve her?

"Daddy…" Rachel said in a hushed voice. She felt overwhelmed at how fast time was passing by as it gets closer and closer to her wedding day. She didn't feel too excited at the moment considering she still has an issue with Jesse that has yet to be resolved. Sometimes Rachel wonders if it will ever be resolved.

"I'm starving let's eat," Rachel said — once again wanting to ignore everything that has to do with her fiancée.

As soon as they were all done with their meals, LeRoy had to leave early so Rachel asked Finn if he wanted to watch a movie with her since she had nothing to do, but Finn suggested to go to his place so that she could see his mom. Finn saw a look of nervousness flash across Rachel's face. The only time Rachel would see Carole is when she would tag along with Burt to visit Kurt which is rarely. Rachel eventually agreed when Finn told her there's nothing to worry about, and that his mom misses her.

There was always a feeling of comfort for Rachel whenever she spends time with Finn and his mom, she always felt like she was a part of the Hudson-Hummel family because Kurt was like her brother, and Carole and Burt would somehow treat her like their own. Rachel was glad nothing has changed between them even though it's been a long time since she actually spent some personal time with Carole.

"Your engagement ring looks beautiful Rachel," Carole complimented, "I'm happy for you both."

Rachel thought Carole wouldn't like it that she was marrying a man who wasn't her son since she would always tell her that she was the only girl Finn wanted to marry, or how she was looking forward to have her as a daughter-in-law one day — so Rachel was surprised at what Carole

"Really?" Rachel asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Yeah, why wouldn't I be?"

"Oh," Rachel blushed in embarrassment when she realized how silly it was to doubt her sincerity. "I'm sorry I just thought– I mean– It's just that—" Rachel tried to compose a proper answer but she could find the appropriate words.

"You thought I wouldn't be happy since you're marrying someone else didn't you?"

"Yeah," Rachel answered truthfully, "I'm sorry. I thought you would hate me."

"Oh sweetie, I could never hate you. And it doesn't matter who you're with, I will always care about you." Carole said.

Rachel smiled, "Thank you," she paused then hesitantly spoke up a few seconds after, "Do you have any idea of what Finn thinks about, you know, me and Jesse?" she asked curiously. Rachel doesn't really know what Finn thinks of her and Jesse together. Rachel doesn't really know why, but most of Finn's opinions mean a lot to her.

"Well he was probably just shocked," Carole shrugged, "But I'm sure he's happy for you."

While Rachel and Carole were downstairs in the living room having their conversation, Finn was in his room talking to Kurt on the phone.

"Did you know she was coming here?"

_**"No. Andrew just told me she was taking a few days off."**_

"Andrew?"

_**"Rachel's co-star. How are things developing between you and her anyway?"**_

"I don't know, Kurt. I don't think I want to screw up a relationship. It's not right."

Finn heard Kurt sigh deeply.

_**"I agree it's not right. But it's not like you're seducing her to have sex with her, you're just… Well– you know–"**_

"I'm what?" Finn asked with a roll of his eyes.

_**"Rachel has been doubting her relationship and running away from her problems from Jesse. Neither her or Jesse are working on their relationship anymore, they just ignore everything that need to be resolved. You're just opening her eyes, Finn."**_

"Fine. But I'm not gonna rush things."

_**"Her wedding is in a week."**_

"Not helping dude," Finn snapped.

_**"I'm just saying."**_

"Alright I have to go."

_**"Good luck."**_

And with that, the other line on the phone went dead. Finn knew Kurt was right — he had to do something.

Finn went downstairs and saw that Rachel was still having a conversation with his mom. He didn't want to interrupt them because it's been a long time since they actually interacted with each other, but he doesn't know how long Rachel would stay here and he wanted to get her to open up to him about how she really feels.

"Hey mom?" Finn called out causing Rachel to fall silent.

"Yes honey?"

"I was kinda hoping to spend the rest of the day with Rachel."

"What about lunch?"

"We will go to a restaraunt if we get hungry."

"Oh," Carole turned her head to Rachel; "Do you want to spend the rest of the day with him?"

Rachel looked down blushing, "If you don't mind," she said shyly.

"I am a bit bummed," she said truthfully, "But I won't mind as long as you come back for dinner."

"That would be lovely. I would love to have dinner with you guys." Rachel gave Carole a hug before she left with Finn.

_Nostalgia —_ That's what Rachel felt when she was walking around the park with Finn. They spent most of the day cloud gazing and telling each other scary stories. During lunchtime, Finn got Chinese food for take out so they could eat by the playground to watch kids as they play. She wishes she could go back in time when she was 16 years old when everything was simple, when she didn't have to worry about so much, and when she was safely hidden from the big bad world. Not that Rachel isn't happy now, she just misses her teenage years.

"I miss living here," Rachel spoke up.

Finn looked at her surprised, "You serious?"

"Yeah," she answered, "I mean don't get me wrong I'm glad that I'm in New York living my dream but.. There are times I miss this place deeply."

Finn gave her a funny look; "Wow I never thought I'd hear you say that," he said.

Rachel giggled, "Don't you miss this place? Your hometown?"

"No," Finn answered.

"I don't believe you."

"Well I don't."

"Well there's gotta be something from your past that you greatly miss," Rachel said.

You. Finn thought to himself.

"Let's go to the swings!" Rachel said without letting Finn give a response to what she said.

Finn chuckled and followed Rachel as she ran to the swing set. He fixed his gaze on her as she pumped her legs making the swing go high.

"Don't you want to join me?" Rachel asked.

Finn shook his head.

Rachel pouted as she stopped pumping her legs. Once the swing was steady, she got off and walked over to Finn. "What do you want to do?" she asked.

"I wanna go back to the lake," He answered.

"It's getting dark. Don't we have to go back before dinner?"

"It will only be for a while. Come on let's walk there since it's near."

"Okay," Rachel obliged.

Rachel looped her arm with Finn's as they started to make their way to the lake. She began to think of Jesse and how she felt when his arms are wrapped around her, or when they would intertwine their fingers together. No one knows exactly what's going on in Rachel's head. She doesn't tell anyone anything anymore, not even Santana or Kurt. She's been comparing both Jesse and Finn with each other. She doesn't know why but it makes her feel like she's being placed on a position where she has to make a choice. Finn or Jesse. Rachel knows she shouldn't compare her fiancée to anyone but she couldn't help it. With Jesse — when there is no conflict between them – she feels safe. But with Finn, she feels a scary feeling that makes her not want to leave his side. Rachel's confusion with everything drove her crazy. She didn't want to be bothered with questions from anyone so she had to show that she was okay when she's actually not.

"You okay?" Finn asked as they sat down in the end of the dock by the lake.

"And what makes you think something's bothering me Mr. Hudson," Rachel said in a playful tone.

"You were quiet the whole time we were going here."

Rachel shrugged, "I'm fine. Don't worry."

"Sure you are," Finn said unconvinced.

"Are you really gonna push me to open up to you?" Rachel whined.

"No, but it's not healthy to keep it bottled up."

"Do you wanna dance?" Rachel asked wanting to drop the topic.

Finn furrowed his eyebrows, "What?"

"Come on!" Rachel grabbed Finn's arm and stood up pulling him with her.

Finn obliged and settled his hands on Rachel's waist as she wrapped her's around his neck and began to sway. It took a bit of time for the awkwardness to go away since the last time Finn and Rachel both danced together was years ago at their senior prom.

"You look very handsome," Rachel complimented as she studied the feautures on Finn's face.

"I'm just wearing a shirt and jeans."

Rachel giggled, "I think it's your eyes."

Finn released a shaky breath. He remembered how it would creep him out at how she would stare at him adoringly when he was still dating Quinn, and how she would get lost into his eyes when he would stare back. It would've been creepy to him then, but if he thinks about it now — he would just laugh at how adorable Rachel actually was when she was crazily obsessed with him. "It's so mesmerizing isn't it?" Finn joked.

"It is," Rachel said seriously causing Finn to stare at her with wide eyes.

"Why are you looking at me like that?" Rachel asked not meaning to sound nervous.

"You can't keep everything bottled in."

Rachel rolled her eyes and stopped swaying, "Let it go, Finn," she said as she unwrapped her arms around Finn's neck.

"I'm sorry, I can't. Look, I'm not trying to push you—"

"But you are!" Rachel yelled.

"Do you remember what I promised you?"

Confusion flashed across Rachel's face, "What?"

"Remember we were watching The Notebook, a-and you were asking if we could make it, and I promised you that we will. I promised you that I would find you if we ever lost each other."

Tears were starting to form in the corner of Rachel's eyes. She didn't know why she was in the verge of tears. Maybe it had something to do with the overwhelming feeling that just hit her. "You remember that?" Rachel said with her voice cracking.

"I remember it all too well," Finn responded, "I still have the engagement ring. It's kept in a box full of pictures of you and me. There are times I hold it just to have the feeling of you being with me. I didn't know why I would hold on to it, but now I do."

"Finn..." Rachel was already crying. She wanted to cover her ears. She didn't want to hear anything Finn has to say. She didn't want to know.

"I love you," Finn blurted out. He didn't want to wait to say it any longer. He couldn't keep it in. "I still do," he continued, "And I'm so–" Finn stopped talking when he felt a hand collide with his cheek. He knew he deserved that.

"You can't say stuff like that when I'm getting married with someone else in a week!"

Finn winced at the anger in Rachel's voice. "I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have pushed you away. I didn't know why I did it but I was so stupid back then and I was just so stressed and I'm sorry. I'm just so sorry."

"Do you really think I'd leave Jesse for you?" Rachel spat.

"No. I was thinking you'd leave him for your own good."

"Why would I do that? He treats me right."

"He may treat you right but does your heart really scream for him? You always avoid your issues with him and you keep doubting your relationship. If your relationship with Jesse really means a lot to you, you'd do something about it to keep it from falling apart. But you're always running away from the problem and you can't run forever, Rachel."

"I care about him!"

"I'm not saying that you don't!" Finn yelled back in frustration, "Just try to hear me out Rachel," he begged with pleading eyes.

"I think you've said enough." Rachel said as she turned around to walk away but she felt Finn grab her arm to stop her, "Let me go Finn!"

"Please, hear me out before you walk away."

"I can't."

"Why not?"

"I just can't Finn!"

It broke Rachel's heart every time she yelled at Finn, but she couldn't take it anymore. When she was in highschool, she liked the idea of being the girl two boys are trying to fight for. She loved how Finn was trying to win her heart from Jesse when they were dating for the first time. It was all fun and games back then but now, it isn't fun anymore. This wasn't some teenage love triangle where it was mostly just jealousy. This involved serious decisions where you have to really think through, and serious heartbreak that wouldn't go away a week later. Rachel would have to break someone's heart. She wished things didn't turn out this way.

"Do you love me? Please just tell me the truth, tell me if you still in love with me," Finn said with desperation in his voice.

Rachel looked down. She couldn't look him in they eyes. It takes one word to either make him be relieved with happiness, or shatter his heart into a million pieces. Just one simple word. But Rachel couldn't say it.

"I love Jesse. I'm marrying him."

"I know, but that wasn't my question. Look at me Rachel," Finn lifted Rachel's chin, "look me in the eyes and tell me that you're not in love with me then I'll leave you alone for good."

"Stop," Rachel begged, "please just stop. I don't want to hurt Jesse, I love him too much to do that. You had your chance Finn, but you blew it. Don't make me do this, please."

Finn sighed in defeat. Rachel was right. He had his chance but he lost it. When Finn saw Rachel take a few steps back, he wanted to stop her and ask her to answer his question but he couldn't get himself to do it. She was also hurting and she was placed in a position nobody would want to deal with.

"Goodbye Finn," Rachel whispered before she turned around and started to walk away.

Watching Rachel walk away from him was painful. He wanted to scream for her — beg her to stop. Tell her he couldn't stand to see her leave him. Finn knew he had to do something — _the right thing_ — and that was to let her go. And so he did.

* * *

**I haven't really decided on how many more chapters, but this story is definitely coming to an end. If there are any typos, I apologize. Thank you for reviews, it's very much appreciated. **


	8. Speak Now

_**"And I love you more than I did before**_

_**And I'm sorry that it's this way**_

_**But I'm coming home I'll be coming home **_

**_And if you ask, I will stay_**

**_I will stay" _**

**_-Stay by Miley Cyrus_**

* * *

Time was killing Finn inside because every second was a second closer to seeing Rachel get married with someone else. Most people would rather feel hurt than nothing at all but for Finn, he'd rather feel nothing than the intense sadness he has been dealing with since Rachel walked away from him. He considered to not attend her wedding but he doesn't want Rachel to feel guilty for his absence. He wanted to show her that he will be alright even though it would pain him to witness the beginning of her life with someone else. He knows he'll have to deal with it eventually, but not now when his heart is still freshly aching for her.

Everything was taking place for Rachel's wedding, there was only a few things to finalize then it's all good to go. Rachel hasn't spoken to Finn for three days. She wanted to but it wasn't so simple for her. She couldn't face him again, walking away from him was hard enough. Rachel was terrified that her last goodbye to him was her final one.

Things between her and Jesse were okay. Jesse said that they both just need to forget everything and focus on the day they will become each other's forever. He wasn't being distant from Rachel anymore but that didn't make Rachel feel certain about their relationship. It was probably because she couldn't stop thinking about Finn. She felt like she needed to make the right choice but niether of them feels right because no matter who she chooses, she will still end up breaking someone's heart and Rachel didn't want to be the cause of someone's heartbreak.

Kurt has yet to hear from Finn, he tried calling him but he wouldn't answer. He couldn't get in touch with Rachel either so he knew that something has happened between them. Rachel is getting married tomorrow, if he doesn't figure out exactly what's going on, he wouldn't have a chance to try and fix their mess. Even though he isn't responsible for their fallout, Rachel is his best friend and he cares about her so much. He doesn't want her to waste anymore of her time with someone just to have another horrible fallout in the end.

"Please tell me you were able to talk to Rachel," Kurt said with desperation as he gripped the phone that was resting on his ear tighter — hoping to hear the answer he wanted.

"I did. She was hysterically crying Kurt. It was so bad."

There was a hint of sadness in Santana's voice. He didn't want to think of Rachel being so broken.

"Did she tell you what happened between her and Finn?"

"She just told me how difficult love is, and how confused she is. Then she said she doesn't know what to do and all I can tell her was to follow her heart which was probably a bad idea because of the state she is in right now."

"Well at this point there's really nothing we can say about the situation she's in — not without her possibly getting angry at our opinions or suggestions. We would have to take action."

"Behind her back?"

"If she knew, she might stop us."

"Her wedding is less than a day away, what is your plan?"

"I don't know."

Kurt could hear Santana groan on the other side of the line before she hung up on him. "Great," he mumbled to himself as he put down his phone. He tried to come up with a plan but he couldn't. Maybe — just maybe — it was too late.

It was exactly two o'clock in the morning and someone was banging on Kurt's door causing him to wake up from his much needed sleep. He groaned as he got up from his bed and tried to walk to the door with his eyes half closed. "Whatever it is, it better be good," He said tiredly when he opened his door. Assuming it was Santana, he was completely surprised when he saw someone else standning on front of him, someone he knew. Jesse's sister. "Karen? What are you doing here? Rachel isn't here," Kurt said confused. Karen gave a response that caught Kurt's attention who is now fully awake.

"There's something I need to tell you about Jesse."

* * *

9:30 AM

Rachel wasn't excited or enthusiastic, she wasn't even nervous. She was having more of a "I just want to get this over with" feeling and she knows that's not a good feeling to feel on her wedding day. She's going to become a wife in a few hours and she's still having second thoughts. Rachel didn't know exactly why she felt like crying. Was it because it's her wedding day and she's just being emotional, or was it because of Finn? A part of her wishes Finn wasn't in love with her so that life wouldn't be hard — so that choosing to marry Jesse wouldn't be difficult. Rachel didn't know what to do to figure out if the choice she was making was the right one so she walked over to the huge closet — since Miranda had chosen two separate suites for her and Jesse — and got her wedding that was covered in a white vinyl garment bag.

Rachel couldn't stop looking at herself in the wall mounted mirror. The feeling she felt when she tried on the dress was still there — beauty and excitement — but the person that was on her mind was Finn. Maybe she was making a mistake. Maybe Finn's the one she needs — the one she wants to hold onto for the rest of her life. Maybe she's in love with him. Maybe she never stopped. She couldn't do this to Finn, and more importantly to herself. "Rachel?" She heard someone call out from outside the door. Rachel looked at the peephole to see who it was before opening it.

"Santana," She breathed out as she opened the door.

"What the hell are you doing? You still need to put the makeup on! I know you're excited but you still have lots of time before-" Santana stopped talking when she saw the tears on Rachel's eyes. She immediately closed the door and pulled Rachel towards the king sized bed motioning her to sit down. "What's wrong?"

"This was a mistake!" Rachel sobbed.

"No honey, the dress is perfect. You look beautiful," Santana said as she rubbed Rachel's back.

"Not the dress. The wedding. My whole relationship with Jesse. I wouldn't be in such a difficult position if I didn't stay with him in the first place."

"Is this about what went down between you and Finn last week?" Santana asked.

Rachel nodded, "Now I would have to break one of their hearts."

"And whose heart would that be?"

Rachel swallowed the lump that formed in her throat before answering, "Jesse."

"I'm sure he would understand."

"I'm scared he wouldn't. He loves me just as much as Finn does, Santana. The only thing is my heart doesn't belong to him but to Finn. I don't want to do this to Jesse especially on our wedding day. I don't know what to do." Rachel couldn't bare with the thought of breaking Jesse's heart. He told her several times that she was her world, now he's about to lose it.

"People would usually say that you should focus on the present, but on this situation you should focus on the future. Think about it Rachel, it would hurt even more if you just figured out your feelings later down the road when you already have kids with Jesse. It would be even more difficult."

"You're right. And I'm sorry I have been so difficult with you these past few months. I was just confused I guess."

"It's alright. It's worth it."

Rachel let out another sob as Santana hugged her tightly, "It'll be okay Rachel."

"I hope so," Rachel said quietly.

"So what are you gonna do?"

"Talk to Jesse."

"Want me to call him?"

Rachel nodded in response. Santana kissed the side of Rachel's head and made her way towards the door. When she opened it, she saw a very exhausted looking Kurt standing in front of her. His hair was messy, and he was only wearing a plain white shit paired with simple jeans which was very odd for him. She didn't even know he owned those type of basic clothing. Santana furrowed her eyebrows, "Kurt?"

Kurt pushed Santana back inside the suite as he made his way in, "I need to talk to Rachel," He looked over to his left where the bed stayed, "Why are you wearing your wedding dress? It's too early," Kurt said to Rachel.

"I just wanted to know if it felt right."

"But you said it was perfect when you got it," Kurt said confused.

"That's not what she—"

Kurt lifted his right hand to silence Santana, "Okay we have no time for this," He walked over to Rachel who was still sitting on the bed, "I'm going to tell you straight to the point on what Jesse's been up to."

All of Rachel's attentions suddenly went to Kurt. She tilted her head, "Wait, how did you know anyway?"

"Karen went by my apartment last night, we stayed up talking about him," Kurt explained.

"No wonder you look like a zombie," Santana commented.

"Stop it Santana," Rachel hissed then looked at Kurt, "What has Jesse been up to?" she asked.

"Filing for divorce," Kurt answered quickly.

"What?" Santana said with a raised voice.

"But we're not even married yet," Rachel said not catching the gist.

Kurt sat down beside Rachel on the edge of the bed, "Sweetie, do you remember when he went to Vegas?"

Rachel just looked at him quietly but he knows what the answer was so Kurt continued, "He married a girl there who turned out to be Karen's friend so when Karen told her about the news of you and Jesse's engagement, the girl told Karen everything that happened between her and Jesse in Vegas. So Karen told Jesse she knows the truth which reminded Jesse that he has yet to file a divorce. Which is probably why he's been acting so strange." Kurt explained.

"That's it, I'm going to find that asshole and I'm going to beat him up," Santana said angrily as she stormed out of the hotel room. Kurt didn't try to stop her, he was too busy trying to read Rachel's face.

Rachel was angry and hurt. Did she not deserve to know the truth? She would've been understanding if Jesse just told her the truth instead of sneaking around behind her back. "I know he cheated on me," Rachel finally spoke up. The sadness in her voice was very evident.

"And you're okay with that?"

"I was okay with it when he confessed to me last year because I thought that Jesse slept with someone once. I had no idea he had a quick marriage."

"Woah, woah, wait. You never told me this," Kurt said completely shocked.

"I know I'm sorry. So is Jesse divorced now?"

Kurt nodded, "Yeah she finally signed it."

"Why did it take her so long?"

Kurt hesitated before he answered, "She got pregnant," he said slowly.

Rachel stared at him in disbelief and shook her head, "But the child isn't Jesse's right?"

"The child is Jesse's. And he only found out recently. They were making agreements because he wanted to be a part of his daughter's life."

Rachel inhaled a sharp breath,"I need to talk to him," She said through her tears. Letting Jesse go would be harder than she thought. The comfort she felt with him would soon be gone. She wished she could forget about everything that Kurt said so she could stay with Jesse a little longer but she had to do something for he is not what her heart wants. "Can I have some time for myself?"

Kurt nodded, "I'll go look for Santana." He stood up from the bed and made an exit.

* * *

Rachel placed deep thought into the situation Jesse was in. She thought about what he did and what his intentions were. Even though it was unecessary to lie, he did what he thought was right. He tried to fix the mess in the past he has made. And the fact that he didn't want to abandon his daughter touched Rachel. She knew from the moment she started dating him again — despite the things he says and the mistakes he made — Jesse has changed for the better. And Rachel hopes whoever he ends up with would realize how amazing he actually is.

Rachel made her way to Jesse's suite, she didn't care about the stares that were thrown on her way since she was still wearing her wedding dress. She didn't want to take it off since Jesse was curious and excited to see her in a dress. Rachel didn't have to wait long for the door to open when she knocked on it. When she saw it was Santana who opened the door, Rachel was nervous to see how badly Jesse was hurt — if she did hurt him.

"How badly did you hurt him?" Rachel asked immediately.

"I didn't hurt him I just called him out," Santana said annoyed with a roll of her eyes, "Why didn't you take that off?"

Rachel ignored Santana's question, "I need a moment alone with Jesse," she said.

Santana sighed, "Kurt lets go," she called out before moving to the side to let Rachel enter.

"Rachel," Jesse said breathlessly when he saw her enter the room, "you look beautiful."

Rachel smiled and waited for Kurt and Santana to leave before she says anything.

"Thank you," Rachel said when she was finally left alone with Jesse in the room, "We need to talk."

Jesse sighed deeply, "I didn't mean to hurt you. I am so sorry Rachel, I dont want you to think of me like how your friends thought of me when we were in high school. I didn't want you to think I haven't changed since then."

"It's okay Jesse. You honestly didn't do anything wrong, you were just trying your best to fix things from the past and you didn't give up no matter how unfortunate your situation was."

"I did it all for you — _for us_."

Rachel walked towards him then caressed his cheek, "I know you did," she said quietly, "And I appreciate the effort you made to keep our relationship working."

"So is the wedding still on?" Jesse asked hopefully.

Rachel tore her gaze away from Jesse's eyes. She couldn't find the courage to tell him no so she just shook her head. She could see tears form from the corner of his eyes. "I'm so sorry. But we can't keep lying to ourselves. We know that we aren't in love with each other. I think we have always known that but we kept choosing to ignore it."

Jesse stayed quiet for a while trying to take in Rachel's words. He didn't feel like fighting anymore. He didn't want to waste more of his energy for something he knew wouldn't last forever. "You're right," He finally spoke up, "but it still hurts to lose someone special," Jesse said. He tried not to breakdown because he didn't want to make this harder for Rachel.

"But we can still be in each other's life. Maybe not now because we need to be okay to see each other without hurting even just a little bit. But you won't completely lose me just like how Kurt and Santana won't ever lose me. You're my best friend. Always were and always will be." Rachel said softly as she was wiping his tears away.

"Okay Rachel Berry," Jesse smiled slightly, "can we make that a deal?"

Rachel giggled, "It's a deal."

"Thank you for showing up in your dress by the way. I really wanted to see how it looked like."

"You're welcome." Rachel paused for a moment before continuing, "I wish you all the best Jesse."

"I wish you all the best too. Finn better not let you go this time."

Rachel bit her lip and looked at Jesse with apologetic eyes.

"Don't feel bad for being in love with someone else. We're just learning the hard way."

Rachel nodded then took a deep break and held onto Jesse's hand one last time. She kissed his cheek before she retracted her hand, "I'll see you around okay?"

"Okay," Jesse said.

And with that, Rachel left the room. It was painful but unlike walking away from Finn, it wasn't draining. It didn't take up all her stregnth to turn around from Jesse. Because walking away from someone who has your heart will drain everything in you in every possible way.

Jesse sent Rachel a text that he'll be the one to explain everything to his mom so Rachel made her way to her own suite to remove the dress and put on comfortable clothing. She knows she has a lot of things to worry about like what her fathers and everyone else would think about her sudden decision, but she honestly didn't care. The only person she was worried about was Finn. She hoped Finn didn't stay in Lima, she hoped he isn't seeing someone else already. As selfish as it was, she hoped he was still waiting for her.

It took Rachel 15 minutes to reach Finn's building. She rushed up the stairs to reach Finn's apartment because it was only on the fourth level and she didn't want to waste anymore time taking the elevator. She was out of breath and completely exhausted once she reached his door. She knocked three times and waited a few seconds before she knocked again.

"Rachel?" She heard Finn say when the door was opened. Rachel threw herself at Finn giving him a tight hug.

"I'm sorry for leaving you. That was the biggest mistake of my life," She mumbled.

Finn was taken aback, "Wait what?"

Rachel pulled away and began to ramble, "I'm still in love with you Finn. I always will be and I'm sorry for being with Jesse. No one could take your place but I still tried to replace you with him. I'm sorry for not figuring that out any sooner and—"

Finn cut her off with passionate kiss which Rachel immediately returned. They both forgot how long it was since they last shared a kiss — but right now, what happened and will happen between them wasn't on their minds. Right now, all they can think of was the feeling they were sharing at this very moment. It took Rachel thirty more seconds for her before she pulled away.

"I know you blame yourself for our fallout buy I want you to know it wasn't just your fault, it was also mine," Rachel said after she pulled away.

"I won't disagree with that," Finn said truthfully.

"I miss you so much," Rachel choked out.

"I miss you too, Rachel. God I miss you so much. I don't ever want to lose you again."

"You won't." Rachel assured him, "But Finn, you have to be patient with me. I just got off a relationship with someone I've been giving my love to for the past four years. I won't instantly be okay just because we shared a long awaited kiss," she explained.

Finn nodded, "I understand. If you're not ready, I will wait for you. I don't care how long I'm going to wait. As long as you'd be in my arms in the end."

"You promise?"

Finn chuckled as he remembered that one night when they were watching The Notebook — that one night when he promised her they would always find their way back It's probably one of Finn's favorite memory to look back to because look at where they are now — they both turned out to keep their promise at the end. One more chance. That's the only thing they both need from each other to make things right. Finn planted a kiss on Rachel's forehead before giving her a reply.

_"I promise." _

* * *

**Alright, there you have it. I guess it's a bit St. Berry centric but I'm posting one last chapter to complete this short story. Thank you guys so much for reading this story and for favoriting/reviewing it. It's ver much appreciated. **


	9. What Happened After

**This chapter is very short, I thought of adding it in the previous chapter but I decided to put this as an epilogue. Again, thank you for reading this story, I'm glad there are people who enjoyed it. Thank you for all the reviews, they made me smile. **

* * *

When Jesse announced that the wedding was called off in the last minute, Rachel's fathers were a bit disappointed because of all the time and effort that were wasted. Rachel didn't speak to them for almost a month but Finn persuaded her to explain and if they still don't understand, she can give them the space they want. But it wasn't necessary because her fathers learned to accept and understand what she did. Miranda and Karen both apologized on behalf of what Jesse did to her. Rachel assured her that she would be fine, she also promised them that she would still keep in touch because the three of them were so close to each other and they didn't want to have a final goodbye. Rachel had a bit of difficulty adjusting to her life without Jesse because she was so used to looking for him all the time. She would cry at night and call Santana or Kurt so she wouldn't feel too lonely or confused. Santana and Kurt would always reassure Rachel that she made the right choice for herself because she would've had second thoughts in calling off the wedding if it wasn't right. Rachel eventually believed what her best friends were trying to tell her. It took four months for her to fully heal and give herself to Finn. She was grateful at how patient he was — grateful that he never gave up on her.

Rachel was sitting on the bed with her head leaned against the headboard. She was playing with her husband's hair as he was fast asleep. Rachel promised herself that she'd never get married after she and Jesse called off the wedding almost three years ago. Marriage has always been a sensitive subject for her since then. Finn didn't try to change her mind because he knew it was fear talking and that her guards were just way up high. Finn didn't push Rachel but he eased the idea of marriage into her, so they eventually got married after a year of being together again.

A baby's cry filled the room causing Finn's head to jerk up. "I got it," Rachel said to Finn, "go back to sleep," she whispered softly. Finn nodded sleepily and rested his head back onto the pillow. Rachel got off the bed and made her way to the crib that was against the wall. She decided to put the crib in their bedroom for just a few months so they wouldn't have to go to the nursery just to check him every time he cries at night. Finn knew Rachel just wanted to be close to their baby as much as possible but he pretended that he believes her reasoning. Rachel picked up her two month old son and gently bounced him in her arms trying to get him to stop crying. The moment she found out she was pregnant, she quickly decided to take a break on broadway. She didn't even give herself time to think the decision through. Family comes first for her and she didn't want to miss any of the special moments — she wanted to be there for Finn and her baby. "Shhh it's okay Micheal," Rachel began to rub his back gently, "Momma's here," she cooed. Rachel hummed when she felt a pair of strong arms wrap around her lower waist.

"I couldn't sleep with all his crying," Finn mumured into Rachel's ear.

Rachel giggled when Finn beggan to nuzzle on her neck, "Which is why I'm trying to get him to stop," she says.

"Want me to calm him down?"

"No it's okay he's mellowing down anyway."

Finn kissed the side of Rachel's head, "I'll wait for you in bed," He said a bit playfully as he unwrapped his arms from her waist.

"Okay," Rachel answered. It didn't take long for Micheal to settle down so Rachel kissed the top of his head and placed him back into the crib, "I love you so much baby boy," she whispered softly before she went back to the bed.

"I love you," Finn mumbled.

"I love you too," Rachel said smiling as she kissed Finn on the lips.

If Rachel and Finn went back into the time when they were still in high school and told their younger selves that the both of them would have a lifetime with each other, it would be very mind boggling for them due to their different personalities and interests. They didn't know what the future would hold for the both of them. Maybe their life would be simple and happy. Maybe they would have lots of arguments later on, or maybe they would have a huge fight that would lead them to a divorce. But no matter what happens — whether they fight all the time or end up divorcing each other — no matter how lost they get, Finn and Rachel knows that the promise that they made all those years ago will never be broken.


End file.
